Monday, February 7, 2011

Quick Hits: DC Edition.

Hey all, three new Quick Hits today, and they all come from the wacky land of DC. On the positive side, one of these comics was actually pretty good. On the negative side, this post looks at three comics...

Secret Six #30:

Summary: We kick off with some slacker learning that his grandfather had died and left him a particle cannon, 3 billion dollars and expected the slacker to carry on the family legacy of crime. The slacker decides to do that, and begins speaking like a reject from 1950's gangster movie for some reason. The slacker gathers his loser friends and decides he needs a secret island base, the Doom Patrol's island. To this end he hires the Secret Six(or Secret Eight in this issue)and the Eight battle the Doom Patrol in the battle NOBODY requested. While the two teams battle it out, the volcano on the Doom Patrol's island explodes.

Thoughts: My god was this bad! First off, who exactly are the members of the Secret Six nowadays? Catman, Bane, Scandal, Deadshot, King Shark, that Banshee woman, Ragdoll and Black Frigging Alice. Now I'm no math whiz, but eight characters do not make a team of Six... If Gail Simone would drop Ragdoll(who is just painfully unfunny now)and Black Alice(yay, a moody goth girl, JUST what we needed!)this team would actually look pretty decent. Even though to this day I'm STILL not sure why Catman decided to rejoin, but what the hell I guess. I've NEVER liked the Doom Patrol, and I'm SHOCKED that they have an ongoing comic! I seriously didn't know that. The second part of this story continues in the Doom Patrol series, and I'll tell you now, there's NO way I'll be picking THAT comic up! Basically the story never came together for me, I didn't like many of the characters in this comic, the villains are the embodiment of the word “lame”, and I didn't even mention Bane's “date”... Yeah, this was bad.

Score: 2 out of 10.I've got nothin' to say here...

Weird Worlds #2(of 6):

Summary: Three stories, so let me try to blitz through them ASAP. After a fun little fight, Lobo captures the alien he was tasked with bringing in, although the alien tries to explain that he wasn't a bad guy and that he was being sent back to the bad guys, probably to his death. Naturally, Lobo could care less. Next was Garbage Man, who returns to the facility that turned him into the creature he was. He meets up with the mad scientist who created him, and the scientist explains that GM couldn't be turned back into a human. The scientist winds up getting killed due to his own evil antics, and with no hope, Garbage Man decides to destroy the entire facility, hoping that the ensuing explosion would FINALLY kill him. Finally we had the Tanga story... She finds a world, babbles on and on for a while, gets drunk, passes out and wakes out with the bar she was at destroyed around her.

Thoughts: I enjoyed the Lobo story immensely, shockingly I LOVED the Garbage Man story, and I absolutely hated the Tanga tale. Lobo is Lobo, and when written properly it's hard to screw that up, and this Lobo story is definitely being written well. Next issue seems to be setting up a moral dilemma for Lobo, who doesn't have morals, so that in and of itself should be interesting. The Garbage Man story continues to surprise me, because I figured it would be horrible. Instead, it's my favorite of the three stories, and in just two short issues I actually find myself feeling sympathetic for GM. So HUGE props to Aaron Lopresti, who did the words and the pencils for that story. Finally, there's Tanga. She's SO annoying I just have nothing nice to say about her story... If that story wasn't included, I'd have probably added another full point to the final score. As is, the final score here is...

Score: 8 out of 10.D'oh!!

JSA All-Stars #15:

Summary: After being blasted by Sylvester Pemberton, Citizen Steel, Power Girl and Tomcat are trapped in some alternate world. Pemberton's forces come under attack by the remaining members of the All-Stars, while Pemberton tells his evil magicians to continue building their ultimate weapon. Pemberton distracts the All-Stars long enough for his magicians to bring the Puzzlemen to life, who are basically giant rock monsters. The Puzzlemen batter the All-Stars and this issue ends with the All-Star's living computer possessing the comatose body of Pemberton's daughter.

Thoughts: Meh. I honestly couldn't even remember what happened last issue in this series. That's never a good sign. I'm still not sure what Pemberton is up to, why he's decided to work with these evil magicians to bring back the Puzzlemen when I thought he wanted to save his daughter, and as for the ending, with Roxy possessing Pemberton's daughter, that just seemed scummy to me. So even though I didn't particularly enjoy this issue, it's still leaps and bounds better than the flagship Justice Society of America series, so I guess that's a positive.

Score: 4 1/2 out of 10.Hey look, it's Power Girl!


  1. Okay, I have to know...who did Bane go on a "date" with??

  2. Bane was set up on a blind date by Scandal. Bane's date? A stripper. Upon seeing her, Bane explained that he'd like to mate with her and that her hips would be good for birthing a child... It was weird... Oh so weird...

  3. Haha, Bane is a pimp! That's the line I used when I hooked up with Falisha. Anyway, that alternate PG looks better with longer hair, and the Secret Eight sounds horrible. Also, DC apparently thinks people LOVED this Doom Patrol thing and their asking which teams the Secret Six should take on next.

  4. See, I wasn't going to comment because I haven't read any of these comics, but I read them and saw my name linked to a complete lie (JT)

    I keep telling myself to get into reading Secret Six because you had some pretty good scores for the most part, but this issue sounded baaaad! lol. Is there any hint at a new arc starting anytime soon? lol. I think I'm better off starting there.

    Before I go, I must admit, Power Girl looks pretty damn good with some long hair. Got a nice rack too! lol.

    I'm out!

  5. Man JT... You had to KNOW that Lisha would see that comment... :D

    Oh goody, maybe the Secret Eight can take on the Metal Men next!!! And yes, that was DRIPPING with sarcasm!

    Idk, Lisha... The last several storylines have been bad to brutal in Secret Six... It USED to be good, but lately? Not at all. You might be better off either reading the older stuff, or just skipping this series altogether. It's just not very good...

  6. Lol that's fine cause it's the truth and she KNOWS it. As for Metal Men vs. Secret Eight, only if they add in the Doom Patrol and the Creature Commandos....

  7. "Creature Commandos"?! HA!! Please don't give DC any ideas, JT! :D

  8. Haha well they WERE in Gen Lost recently... which of course will make you not read it for even LONGER, but if it weren't for that I wouldn't even know who they were... nor would I care.

  9. Haha, "Creature Commandos"...that reminds me of a few years ago when Marvel tried to bring back the Howling Commandos as a team of supernatural characters like Frankenstein, Werewolf by Night, was that horrible!

  10. I actually have that Howling Commandos mini-series, Marc! It's buried in one of my comic book titles, but yeah, I actually own it... Why I own it, I have no idea, but I do!