Titans #35 & Weird Worlds #6

Two more DC books to get through before I switch back to Marvel later on today. And since I'll be posting again later on, that's as much of an introduction as I plan on doing for now!

Titans #35:

Summary: We kick this one off with Drago going through Cheshire's mind and learning her real reason for joining the Titans... She was hoping Deathstroke would kill her, which would punish her for “allowing” her daughter to die. Drago feeds Cheshire all sorts of things she'd want to hear, and leaves her conflicted as to whether she wanted to stay with him or not. The Tattooed Man returns to his neighborhood and learns that the goons he left in charge were using his name to keep the neighborhood in check by terrorizing everybody. Before the Tattooed Man can figure out how he felt about that fact, Vixen confronts him, which naturally leads to a fight. Meanwhile, Osiris wants to declare war on a country next to Kahndaq against the wishes of his recently returned sister, Isis. Back at Drago's headquarters, That Junkie Roy manages to free Cinder from her jail cell, so she in turn frees him, and they decide to split up to find Cheshire and Deathstroke. As for Deathstroke, Drago sends him into the caverns beneath his base to be eaten by crazed cannibals.

Thoughts: Meh. This comic was okay, but like pretty much every comic coming out of DC today, it's speeding towards the conclusions to the various storylines going on inside it. Honestly, this is a series that really NEEDS a reboot, as it took three of my favorite characters(Deathstroke, Arsenal and Cheshire) and made me not care about them... And I don't even fully blame Eric Wallace for that, he was just dealt a bad hand when he was given this comic. If you're given a bunch of destroyed tools, you can't really build anything good. All I'm gonna say is this: the DC reboot gives DC the chance to fix the hideous decision to kill off Lian Harper. Here's hoping they do the right thing and bring Lian back, even if it's as a baby or something.

Score: 5 1/2 out of 10.Slade talks a good game... For a blind man!


Weird Worlds #6(of 6):

Summary: Lobo manages to remove an evil alien from power on some planet and helps instill the rightful ruler, Garbage Man meets another swamp monster not unlike himself, but gets shot by some hick, and Tanga battles monsters. Am I forgetting anything? ......... Nope, that's about it.

Thoughts: Eh. The Lobo story bugged me since it had Lobo assisting somebody he was paid to capture. I mean Lobo is THE bounty hunter in the DCU, since when does he let his conscience dictate his actions? For that matter, since when does Lobo even HAVE a conscience?! The Garbage Man story, which had been my favorite tale for most of this mini-series, dealt more with some little abused kid and his friend, a random swamp monster, while Garbage Man was treated like, well, garbage. Bizarrely, the Tanga tale, which has been my least favorite story for pretty much this entire mini-series, was the best of the bunch this issue. It was finally amusing, unlike the prior 5 parts of Tanga's tale, where she was just unbearably annoying. Most of these characters will be returning in a few months in another mini-series, but I can guarantee you right now that I won't be picking that mini up. This mini just didn't give me enough incentive to plunk down $4 for another round of mediocre stories.

Score: 5 1/2 out of 10.Tanga wasn't that bad this issue... Go figure.

Supergirl #64 & Weird Worlds #5

Two more DC comics, two more mediocre scores... Jeez, the last few comics I've read have been downright depressingly average/bad...

Supergirl #64:

Summary: With Robin, Fake Beetle and Miss Martian under his thrall, Dubbilex tells Miss Martian to tear all of the information about Krypton out of Supergirl's head while he went off to deal with his father(actually a computer). Dubbilex destroys his “father” because it said he was acting irrationally(that'll learn it!), at which point Supergirl flies into the room and attacks. Dubbilex isn't too worried, since he figures he can just reach into Supergirl's mind and stop her from attacking him, but he is surprised to learn that he couldn't halt SG's attack. Miss Martian walks in the room and explains that when Dubbilex took over her mind, he left her a backdoor into HIS mind, which she used to regain her own senses as Dubbilex went around mind controlling others. A quick punch in the face later, and Dubbilex is finished. Cadmus takes possession of Dubbilex and put him back in the tube he came out of, and that's pretty much a wrap.

Thoughts: Hmm, my DC reviews are getting shorter and shorter as I lose more and more patience with the company... How unfortunate. Was there anything incredibly wrong with this comic? No, not really. SG had a threat to face and wound up beating it with a little help from her friends. Unfortunataly, I just don't find myself caring about this charater or this series anymore... Since Marvel screwed up DC's plans of making Nick Spencer the new ongoing writer of Supergirl, DC is changing writers AGAIN with the next issue, and to be 100% honest, I have NO idea if I'll be picking that issue up. As of right now, I'll probably be dropping this title, but who knows, maybe between now and Wednesday(when I go to the comic shop) I'll have changed my mind. But right now? I honestly don't expect to be posting another Supergirl review on this blog anytime soon.

Score: 5 out of 10."Don't worry, Lois, if your husband dies, I'll be there to protect Metropolis." "Thanks... I guess..."


Weird Worlds #5(of 6):

Summary: As always, three stories in this one. First up is Lobo, who is still hunting down his bounty money(from the people he killed a few issues back...). Anyway, Lobo and his former bounty, S'Glayne, manage to get to the treasure room of the planet and discover S'Glayne's father there. S'Glayne's father shoots his son, ending that story. The Garbage Man story involves Garbage Man talking to a bum preacher on a train, while attracting the attention of the Batman(Bruce Wayne). The Tanga story involves Tanga talking incessantly and annoying the hell out of me.

Thoughts: How's that for a quick review? As usual, the Garbage Man story was my favorite, the Lobo story was simply okay, and the Tanga story was nearly unbearable. If you've read any of my other reviews for this mini-series, it's basically the same thing. Next issue is the last for this mini, and to be perfectly honest with you, I'm glad, because while this isn't a horrible mini, I could definitely be using the $4 I'm spending here elsewhere...

Score: 6 out of 10.Lobo's life is weird...

Outsiders #38 & Weird Worlds #4

Two DC comics to sludge through here. Seeing as that these two comics are among DC's lower selling titles, the reviews are a bit on the brief side, because let's face it, nobody cares about them anyway!

Outsiders #38:

Summary: Markovia is under siege by several of its neighboring countries as well as a few scattered super-powered mercenaries. Oh yeah, a group of Outsiders led by Black Lightning are there as well thanks to Amanda Waller, with orders to kill Geo-Force(I think...). While the streets of the country are full of chaos, Geo-Force simply watches from his castle while the Olympian practically begs Geo-Force to get out there and defend his people. However, Geo-Force is having a Hamlet moment, and instead stands there all broody and melancholy. Eventually the Black Lightning Outsides breech Geo-Force's castle and are met by Katana and the Olympian. As for Geo-Force, he manages to get out of his funk and heads out into the streets to put down the invaders. In the end, some weird guys who I don't know stand around and talk about how the old world order is nearly upon them... Oooookay then...

Thoughts: I was thoroughly enjoying this one right up until that bizarre ending. I mean there really wasn't much of a story here, Waller's Outsiders were fighting mercs, and the Outsiders who were still loyal to Geo-Force, while Geo-Force literally watched his country burn. Simple. And for some titles, simple is good. This series doesn't have much longer to go before cancellation(maybe one more issue?), but it's good to see that it's going to go out with a bang instead of a whimper.

Score: 7 out of 10.Geo-Force am sad!


Weird Worlds #4(of 6):

Summary: Ugh, do I HAVE to do this... *sigh* I might as well get this over with as quickly as possible... Three stories here, with Lobo starring in the first. After escaping from some planet last issue, Lobo decides to go back to collect his bounty, even though he killed the guy who originally hired him... That's some strange logic there... Lobo and his former bounty/current driver, S'Glayne try to hitch a ride underneath a larger spacecraft to sneak back on to the planet. However, Lobo's ship is attacked by organic parasites whose job it is to keep intruders off the larger ship. Lobo heads out to attack, but is overwhelmed, and we find out that S'Glayne was apparently a pumped up version of the parasites. The Garbageman story featured Garbageman fighting and defeating a werewolf, while the Tanga story has her drunkenly defeating a giant monster and earning the gratitude of an entire planet...

Thoughts: GAH! What happened here?! I mean usually at least one of these stories would be at least decent(usually the Garbageman story), but this month? No deal. All of the stories just didn't LEAD to anything. I mean last issue Lobo left the planet, this issue he inexplicably decides to head back to collect a bounty from a dead man, Garbageman fights a werewolf(for what reason I have NO idea), and Tanga was still drunk... Nothing really exciting happened in any of the three stories, so I can't really give this comic a score any higher than a...

Score: 4 out of 10.I also hoped it wouldn't come to this...

Quick Hits: DC Edition.

Hey all, three new Quick Hits today, and they all come from the wacky land of DC. On the positive side, one of these comics was actually pretty good. On the negative side, this post looks at three comics...

Secret Six #30:

Summary: We kick off with some slacker learning that his grandfather had died and left him a particle cannon, 3 billion dollars and expected the slacker to carry on the family legacy of crime. The slacker decides to do that, and begins speaking like a reject from 1950's gangster movie for some reason. The slacker gathers his loser friends and decides he needs a secret island base, the Doom Patrol's island. To this end he hires the Secret Six(or Secret Eight in this issue)and the Eight battle the Doom Patrol in the battle NOBODY requested. While the two teams battle it out, the volcano on the Doom Patrol's island explodes.

Thoughts: My god was this bad! First off, who exactly are the members of the Secret Six nowadays? Catman, Bane, Scandal, Deadshot, King Shark, that Banshee woman, Ragdoll and Black Frigging Alice. Now I'm no math whiz, but eight characters do not make a team of Six... If Gail Simone would drop Ragdoll(who is just painfully unfunny now)and Black Alice(yay, a moody goth girl, JUST what we needed!)this team would actually look pretty decent. Even though to this day I'm STILL not sure why Catman decided to rejoin, but what the hell I guess. I've NEVER liked the Doom Patrol, and I'm SHOCKED that they have an ongoing comic! I seriously didn't know that. The second part of this story continues in the Doom Patrol series, and I'll tell you now, there's NO way I'll be picking THAT comic up! Basically the story never came together for me, I didn't like many of the characters in this comic, the villains are the embodiment of the word “lame”, and I didn't even mention Bane's “date”... Yeah, this was bad.

Score: 2 out of 10.I've got nothin' to say here...


Weird Worlds #2(of 6):

Summary: Three stories, so let me try to blitz through them ASAP. After a fun little fight, Lobo captures the alien he was tasked with bringing in, although the alien tries to explain that he wasn't a bad guy and that he was being sent back to the bad guys, probably to his death. Naturally, Lobo could care less. Next was Garbage Man, who returns to the facility that turned him into the creature he was. He meets up with the mad scientist who created him, and the scientist explains that GM couldn't be turned back into a human. The scientist winds up getting killed due to his own evil antics, and with no hope, Garbage Man decides to destroy the entire facility, hoping that the ensuing explosion would FINALLY kill him. Finally we had the Tanga story... She finds a world, babbles on and on for a while, gets drunk, passes out and wakes out with the bar she was at destroyed around her.

Thoughts: I enjoyed the Lobo story immensely, shockingly I LOVED the Garbage Man story, and I absolutely hated the Tanga tale. Lobo is Lobo, and when written properly it's hard to screw that up, and this Lobo story is definitely being written well. Next issue seems to be setting up a moral dilemma for Lobo, who doesn't have morals, so that in and of itself should be interesting. The Garbage Man story continues to surprise me, because I figured it would be horrible. Instead, it's my favorite of the three stories, and in just two short issues I actually find myself feeling sympathetic for GM. So HUGE props to Aaron Lopresti, who did the words and the pencils for that story. Finally, there's Tanga. She's SO annoying I just have nothing nice to say about her story... If that story wasn't included, I'd have probably added another full point to the final score. As is, the final score here is...

Score: 8 out of 10.D'oh!!


JSA All-Stars #15:

Summary: After being blasted by Sylvester Pemberton, Citizen Steel, Power Girl and Tomcat are trapped in some alternate world. Pemberton's forces come under attack by the remaining members of the All-Stars, while Pemberton tells his evil magicians to continue building their ultimate weapon. Pemberton distracts the All-Stars long enough for his magicians to bring the Puzzlemen to life, who are basically giant rock monsters. The Puzzlemen batter the All-Stars and this issue ends with the All-Star's living computer possessing the comatose body of Pemberton's daughter.

Thoughts: Meh. I honestly couldn't even remember what happened last issue in this series. That's never a good sign. I'm still not sure what Pemberton is up to, why he's decided to work with these evil magicians to bring back the Puzzlemen when I thought he wanted to save his daughter, and as for the ending, with Roxy possessing Pemberton's daughter, that just seemed scummy to me. So even though I didn't particularly enjoy this issue, it's still leaps and bounds better than the flagship Justice Society of America series, so I guess that's a positive.

Score: 4 1/2 out of 10.Hey look, it's Power Girl!

Weird Worlds #1(of 6)

Review: Three stories here to get to, and as usual, I'll tackle them one at a time... Because really, how else COULD I do this? First up we find Lobo laying against a wall with his brains literally blown out. It seems Lobo was taken out by some bounty hunter who had come to a bar looking for the same bounty Lobo was. Since he didn't want to share the reward with Lobo, he tried to jump him, and due to sheer dumb luck, Lobo was shot in the head. Of course the other bounty hunter embellishes the story wildly, basically stating that he trounced Lobo from start to finish. Lobo eventually heals and beats the bounty hunter to death for sullying his name, before preparing to confront the bounty, a giant four-armed goon. Next up was a story about Garbage Man... Yes, Garbage Man. Garbage Man was operated on against his will by some unscrupulous doctor trying to create super-soldiers for the government. The experiment didn't work out, so the doctor blew up the lab. Eventually Garbage Man woke up a... changed lump on trash, not really remembering much, just remembering he wanted to get revenge on the evil doctor. The final story was about some incredibly annoying alien named Tanga. It seems Tanga was searching for some intelligent life in space, and had gone through like 215 planets with no luck. She eventually runs into a ship, tries to talk to it but is attacked by the ship. Frustrated, she blows the ship up before continuing her journey.

Thoughts: Okay, the Lobo story was a lot of fun, like most properly written Lobo stories are. The Garbage Man story was WAY better then it had any right to be. The Tanga story was akin to torture. She just wouldn't shut up! I get that Kevin Maguire, who wrote her story, was trying to show that she was coping with being alone for so long by talking to herself, but I don't think he realized how annoying(or boring)it was for one character to prattle on and on for pages on end about nothing in particular. As a matter of fact, I found myself skipping whole chunks of dialogue because it was so meaningless. Even though I was REALLY disappointed by the Tanga story, I did enjoy the rest of the stories and will be looking forward to next month's issue. Oh, and on a funny note, remember when DC made all that noise about rolling back the price of their comics to $2.99? They then began to display “$2.99” in large print on all of their covers... Except for this one. This comic had a going price of $3.99, which is hidden way at the bottom of the book by the bar code in little print... What a pathetic move THAT was. If you're going to make a ruckus about your lower prices, and then prominently display the lower prices, then shouldn't you prominently display ALL of your prices, not just the lower ones? It's little things like that that'll really get under my skin.

Score: 7 1/2 out of 10.That's one way to shut somebody up!