Wolverine and Jubilee #4 & Uncanny X-Force #8

Two Marvel reviews to get through here, including one that was so bad it was nearly Brightest Day bad! Hmm, then again, that's probably overstating things... NOTHING is Brightest Day bad...

Wolverine & Jubilee #4(of 4):

Summary: With Jubilee lost in... um, I don't know, a necklace, Wolverine is trying to figure out how to free her. Meanwhile, Rockslide meets a dragon and befriends it... Oh boy, this is going to be one of THOSE comics, isn't it... In necklace world, Jubilee runs into a mammoth dragon, that seems intent on killing her because she was trespassing or something. The dragon Rockslide was talking to sends him to help Jubilee, but he isn't exactly that excited to be fighting a giant dragon. Wolverine finds a magic ring inside the head of a zombie(yes, really), and the ring transports him to necklace world. He meets up with Jubes and Rockslide, which gives Jubes the courage to fight the giant dragon. Jubes meets with little success, so Wolvie and Rockslide distract the dragon, giving Jubilee enough time to climb up the dragon and spear it through the head, killing it. For some reason, killing the dragon sends Wolvie, Jubilee and Rockslide back to Earth, which is as good a place as any to end this review.

Thoughts: This was ALL sorts of bad! I skipped most of the end, with Wolvie talking to the Whore, and Rockslide talking to Jubilee, because it pretty much went nowhere... Kind of like this entire mini-series actually. There was no finality to anything. The vampire that framed Jubes and played Wolvie basically disappeared last issue and was little more than an after thought here. You know, the vampire who was the main antagonist for the majority of this mini-series! Now I remember why I hated Kathryn Immonen's Runaways run! This issue was simply terrible. If not for the art, I'd have happily given this comic an even lower score.

Score: 2 1/2 out of 10.A no-prize to the first person who can explain a)what the purpose of this mini-series was, and b)what the HELL was going on in this issue!


Uncanny X-Force #8:

Summary: Deathlok decides to watch over the World, since Weapon Infinity would sprout from the World if it fell into the wrong hands. While Fantomex isn't thrilled with that idea, he decides to let Deathlok stand guard over the shrunken city. While that is going on, Deadpool is on an X-Force mission at an army base after Psylocke reported sensing some unusual psychic activity emanating from there. Pool's devices don't pick up on any weird readings, but his transmission is cut off, leading Wolverine to believe that something was wrong there. Wolvie goes looking for the rest of the team, and discovers Archangel and Psylocke having one of their meditation sessions. Before Wolvie interrupts, Psylocke manages to lock away Warren's evil Archangel persona. The team is gathered, and they head to the army base, where Psylocke immediately senses the presence of the Shadow King(!). Psylocke meets the Shadow King on the astral plane and attacks, but is assaulted by the King's vast psionic abilities. The Shadow King takes control of all of the members of X-Force except for Fantomex(who is immune to psychic tampering due to his mask), and sends the mutants out to kill Psylocke's body and launch nuclear missiles at Crazy Mutie Island. Say what you will, but the Shadow King sure is ambitious! Fantomex protects Psylocke's body for as long as he can, but is overpowered by Deadpool and Wolverine. As for Psylocke, she realizes that she couldn't defeat the Shadow King on the astral plane, so she heads back to her body, rushing inside the base to stop Archangel from launching the nukes. Psylocke enters Archangel's mind to protect him from the Shadow King, but inadvertently draws the Shadow King into Archangel's mind, where he immediately senses evil Archangel. Shadow King releases evil Archangel, who repays him by slicing his astral projection to shreds. Before Psylocke can do anything, evil Archangel banishes her from his mind and forces her to forget what she had just witnessed. From there, Archangel wakes up and slaughters an innocent soldier. The rest of X-Force, now free of the Shadow King arrive on the scene and figure that killing the soldier was the only way Archangel could prevent him from launching the missiles.

Thoughts: I'll admit, I'm a sucker for old school X-Men villains, so seeing the Shadow King here made my day. Besides that though, there really isn't much else to say about this one. It focused heavily on Psylocke and Archangel, who are probably my two least favorite X-Forcers. Plus it made me remember that awful X-Men storyline from the 90's with Psylocke and the Shadow King... Ugh... As for this comic, it was okay. Not great, not awful, simply okay.

Score: 6 1/2 out of 10.Yes, I am a closet Shadow King fan...

Quick Hits: 3/30/11

Four more reviews up for tonight, as I've managed to read nearly ALL of the comics in my new comic pile! Of course I'll be picking up a whole mess of new comics tomorrow, so my new comic pile will be replenished, but it was nice to almost see my nightstand again... Besides that, I just got the Avengers: The Korvac Saga hardcover from Amazon earlier today, and plan on beginning it later on tonight. That's all from me, let's get to those reviews.

X-Men #9:

Summary: The Whore, Wolverine, Storm, Gambit and Spidey are still searching the sewers of New York hoping to locate the Lizard, who they believe is transforming disgruntled teenage outcasts into lizard creatures like himself. However, we learn early on in this one that Lizard had been captured and his work was being corrupted by Dark Beast(I was right!!!). Being a mad scientist, Dark Beast was intrigued by Dr. Connors work, and as such wanted to perfect it even more. While the X-Men(and Spidey) are making their way through the sewers, Dark Beast is sending lizard teenagers out to stop them. Eventually the X-Men and Spidey make their way into Dark Beast's inner sanctum, where he pushes his lizard button and transforms all of the heroes, except for The Whore(who was safe in her diamond form) into bloodthirsty lizard creatures.

Thoughts: Dark Beast was in this comic, so it was automatically a good read in my book! Whenever one of the Age of Apocalypse characters shows up in a comic, I am one happy camper, especially since Dark Beast, besides Nate Grey of course, is my favorite AOA refuge. Besides my Dark Beast lust, the story here was actually quite good. It makes perfect sense that a mind as depraved as Dark Beast's would be enamored by Curt Connors work, and would want to perfect it. Dark Beast using a bunch of kids who were outcasted by society also made perfect sense, since they would be the most likely types of kids who would run away from home, thus raising no alarms in most people's heads. I also liked the ending, with Dark Beast turning the X-Men(and Spidey) into Lizard creatures. The only bad thing about that is that it means The Whore is going to wind up saving the day, and that is going to piss me of royally... But until that happens, this comic was all good.

Score: 8 out of 10.Awesomeness, thy name is Dark Beast!


Wolverine and Jubilee #3(of 4):

Summary: We begin this issue with Wolverine trying to catch the vampire woman who had Jubilee under her spell. Unfortunately for Wolvie, the vampire is too fast for him, and can easily avoid his attack. Eventually the vampire does something to Jubilee that makes Jubilee suddenly vanish. The vampire tells Wolvie that if he ever wanted to see Jubes again he'd assist her on some sort of errand. With no real choice, Wolvie agrees to go. Wolvie heads to Chernobyl, while Jubes awakens in some strange empty world. Rockslide's hands also begin to glow, which he believes is from when he crushed some sort of mystical amulet a few issues back. To figure out what was up, Rockslide heads to the place where he found the amulet and is attacked by a dragon. Back with Wolvie, he heads under Chernobyl and discovers a strange, handless man, who tells Wolvie that he won't part with whatever the vampire woman wanted. Rapidly tiring of the weird man, Wolvie kills him and tears open the box the man was trying to protect, finding a mess of magical amulets, one of which seemed to be holding Jubilee.

Thoughts: First things first, the Rockslide scene's were ABSOLUTELY pointless. I don't get why Rockslide is still alive while so many better young mutants are dead(Wallflower, Icarus, Wolf Cub, Tag, etc.)... No, we get Rockslide, Armor and Dust... Anyway, the story here was okay, as it has slowly gotten better as this mini-series has moved forward. Sure, it's nothing great, but it is an okay way to spend a few minutes.

Score: 6 1/2 out of 10.Usage #265 for Wolverine's claws, opening stubborn packages.


Uncanny X-Force #6:

Summary: Fantomex is dealing with those blasted Deathlok cyborgs who have killed his mother and managed to steal the World. While that is going on, the members of X-Force are actually undecided as to whether they should bother helping Fantomex or not, since some members(Psylocke and Deadpool) are still miffed about Fantomex murdering Kid Apocalypse. Fantomex gets an assist from the main Deathlok(you know, the one from the 90's), and manages to get the World away from Captain America-Deathlok. By this point X-Force finally does arrive on the scene and help Fantomex and Deathlok get away, as well as capturing Captain America-Deathlok. The team forces Cap-Deathlok to interface with EVA and we learn that these Deathlok's are from a future where most of the super-heroes had been turned into Deathloks, which ushers in a utopia for mankind. However, the Deathlok's are sent back in time because Apocalypse has begun to bring their Utopian society crashing down. Archangel can't understand why the Deathloks were trying to kill Fantomex, since he was the one who killed Kid Apocalypse. Before the team can get any more answers from Cap-Deathlok, he kills himself after realizing all the evil he had done. Realizing that they had to halt the Father, who was controlling the Deathloks, Fantomex decides that the team had to enter the World to find and kill the Father.

Thoughts: I was finally getting into this story towards the end. The last issue left me a bit confused(okay, A LOT confused!), but Cap-Deathlok did a great job of filling in a lot of the blanks for me this issue. I did find it interesting that the Deathloks seemed interested in preventing Apocalypse from messing up their future society and have decided to go after Fantomex... Could that mean that the big A was somehow able to hop from Kid Apocalypse to Fantomex before the fateful shot was fired? I also liked that some members of X-Force(notably Psylocke) were still holding a grudge against Fantomex for his murdering of Kid Apocalypse. That's the type of wound that's not going to heal anytime soon, so I'm glad that Rick Remender keeps referencing back to that moment. I'm still not enjoying this story as much as the prior one, but we're definitely getting better.

Score: 7 out of 10.Well there's a conversation stopper for you!


Superman/Batman #82:

Summary: With some help from Dr. Occult and *sigh* Detective Chimp, Batman breaks into some wannabe magical villains base in an effort to figure out who they were working for. The punks don't know much, only that their mysterious benefactors were trying to preform the Final Spell on the Witch's Highway. Bats takes this info back to Occult and Chimp, which leads to Occult realizing that they were going to need the assistance of a witch. Meanwhile, Superman learns that he was pulled into the future by an older Batman. Old Bats tells Supes that the magicians DID manage to preform the Final Spell, which sacrificed the sun to some dark gods. All of the good sorcerers on Earth then banded together and recreated the sun, but it was a magical sun, and the Earth was now overrun with demons. Needless to say, Supes wants to know why Old Bats simply didn't go back in time to warn the Justice League or somebody as to what the evil magicians were planning on doing. Before he can get an answer though, they are attacked by the Creeper and an army of Solomon Grundys. After a bit of a battle, Old Bats tells Supes that since he was under a magic sun he had different powers, and Supes manages to banish the villains away. Back in the present, Bats, Chimp and Occult manage to track down a witch, more specifically, Klarion Bum... Bum... Bum... The Witch Boy!

Thoughts: This story is starting to grow on me... I guess that's no surprise, seeing as that I AM a sucker for futuristic, dystopian society stories... There's still lots that needs to be explained(why Old Bats needed Supes, what the Witch's Highway was, why Old Bats didn't warn anybody in the present as to what was going to happen, etc), but so far I'm enjoying this one. Plus, and I'm a bit embarrasses to admit this, I am a bit of a fan of Klarion as well...

Score: 7 out of 10.Bum... Bum... Bum...

Quick Hits: 2/22/11

Rejoice True Believers, it's yet ANOTHER all-Marvel edition of Quick Hits! I'll get back to DC tomorrow, but today is a Marvel-ous day. See what I did there? Pretty clever, no? Meh. Anyway, we have three comics to get through so hows about I shut my yap and get started?

Generation Hope #4:

Summary: Having captured Kenji(the EVIL Japanese “light”)the X-Men load him onto their plane and fly back to Utopia with Hope and the other 4 “lights”... God, I REALLY hate that term, “lights”... I don't know why, but it really irks me. Maybe it's just me. Anywho, the X-Men touch down on Crazy Mutie Island and tell the “lights” that they'll be given rooms after they get checked out by Dr. Nemesis. The animal-like “light”, Teon(I think that's his name...) decides to attack Wolverine to see who the alpha... um, alpha animal themed mutant is and gets put in his place by Wolvie. While the other “lights” are getting their various check-ups, Emma Frost and Lord Summers talk to Kenji who explains that he never meant to hurt anybody, he wasn't in control of his body, etc. Emma doesn't think he's lying, so Lord Summers agrees to let him stay on Crazy Mutie Island. Nemesis tells the “lights' about their powers, and they are given rooms. They meet up with the now contrite Kenji and he apologizes to them all profusely for his earlier actions before heading to his room to act all crazy.

Thoughts: I basically still have the same problem with this comic that I've been having with this series thus far... None of the “lights” stand out. Besides Hope, I only know them by vague descriptions... We have Animal Boy, Blue Girl, Self-Loathing Girl, and Horny Boy... Those are REALLY sucky codenames... Well except for “Horny Boy”. That has potential. The other ones though? Pure suck. The only new mutant who stands out is Kenji, and that's only because he's crazy. The last page teaser image showed that the kids appear to be getting costumes next issue, which means codenames should follow(I hope!). Once they have codenames I'd figure they'd become more distinctive and I'd be able to tell them apart better... Or at least that's what I'm hoping for.

Score: 7 out of 10.Oh, you KNOW he's up to no good!


Wolverine and Jubilee #2(of 4):

Summary: Jubilee wakes up in a strange room and finds a glass of blood which she takes a sip of before wondering where she was. Wolverine enters the room and tells Jubes he had taken her to Siberia, since there wasn't many hours of sunlight, and even when there was sun, it was usually overcast. Wolvie decides to do the whole “tough love” thing to snap Jubes out of her vampire funk, but Jubes is on to Wolvie's games and isn't buying. After Wolvie's failed tough love experiment, the two head back to their hotel where the hotel owner tells them some sort of sob story about zombies having invaded a mine in the town. The duo head to the mine and Jubes basically singlehandedly defeats all of the zombies while Wolvie watched. With the zombie trouble taken care of, Wolvie and Jubes head back to their hotel room, and this issue ends with Wolvie waking up to find the mysterious vampire woman from last issue standing over the fallen Jubilee.

Thoughts: See, now THIS was what I wanted out of the last issue of this mini-series! Just Wolverine and Jubilee. Not the rest of the crazy, and QUITE annoying X-crew. I liked Wolvie's attempts at forcing Jubes to deal with what she had become in his own unique Wolverine style, and I was even happier when Jubes caught on to what Wolvie was playing at and wouldn't feed into his games. I mean there really wasn't MUCH story advancement, but that was fine, as the dialogue was really well done and captured Wolvie and Jubes relationship really well.

Score: 7 1/2 out of 10.I'd bet Wolvie didn't see THAT coming!


Amazing Spider-Man #654.1:

Summary: Although this comic was called “Amazing Spider-Man”, it very easily could have been called Amazing Venom, since the new Flash Thompson Venom took center stage here. We see Flash on his first mission with the Venom symbiote, trying to mess up Flag Smasher's Ultimatum plans. Flash infiltrates a meeting between several of the world's major economic players and spots an Ultimatum agent, placing a bug on her person. Later on, Flash discovers that Ultimatum had captured one of the people at the meeting, and using the bug he placed on the Ultimatum agent he is able to track the terrorist group down. Flash finds the captured man and tries to get him out of there, but is accosted by Flag Smasher and his goons. The goons throw some grenades at Flash, blowing his legs off, which puts him into an old school, “I'll eat your brains!” type Venom rampage. Flash decimates the goons, and bites off Flag Smasher's hand before regaining control and getting the captive out of there. Upon meeting with his commanding officers, Flash explains that the mission went well, and although disturbed by what he had seen, the captive doesn't let on that Flash lost control. Although they can't prove anything, Flash's commanders suspect something fishy happened on that mission, and are concerned when they take the symbiote off of Flash but are only able to get 99% of the symbiote out of Flash...

Thoughts: I definitely enjoyed this issue, and as such am REALLY looking forward to the upcoming Venom series. Several important things happened here, namely Flash losing control of his temper and the symbiote taking control of his actions, as well as the fact that 1% of the symbiote remained in Flash's system, meaning permanent bonding with the symbiote is a possibility. Oh, and on a personal note, it was nice to be able to type the word, “Flash” in a comic book review again, even though this wasn't the Flash I necessarily want to be reading about...

Score: 8 1/2 out of 10.Yummy!

Wolverine and Jubilee #1(of 4)

Review: The X-Men have figured the best way to deal with Jubilee's vampirism was to inject her with Wolverine's healing factor powered blood. Somehow this act is managing to counter the aggressive nature of Jubilee's vampire side. However, Jubilee is still slamming herself into the Plexiglas room she was locked in, leading the X-Men to believe that Wolvie's blood wasn't working. Wolvie disagrees and goes to talk to Jubilee, discovering that she was basically just angry about being locked up, not vampire angry, but Jubilee angry. Wolvie tells the X-Men to let Jubilee out of her cell, which although they are hesitant, they agree to do. Jubilee move into a normal bedroom and seems listless, so Wolvie tells her to go exercise or something to get her mind off of her troubles. Jubilee heads to the gym where she is pestered by Rockslide and threatened by Armor. Wolvie angrily comes over and tells Armor to get lost, while telling Jubilee that Emma Frost wanted to see her. Emma tells Jubilee that the X-Men were willing to help her however she wanted, but Jubilee is unsure what she wants right now. Jubilee also feels that everybody on Crazy Mutie Island(Utopia)hates her, so Emma disproves that by bringing Pixie in to hang out with Jubilee. Pixie keeps trying to cheer Jubilee up, but only manages to get her angrier, leading to Jubilee leaving Crazy Mutie Island and heading to a bar in San Fransisco. While at the bar, Jubilee runs into another vampire, who convinces Jubilee to come with her. With Jubilee gone for a while, Wolverine(and Rockslide for some reason)go out to search for Jubilee and find her locked in a shipping crate full of dead bodies. Jubilee swears that she didn't kill the people in the crate(even though she was covered in their blood), so Wolvie takes away a necklace that Jubilee was given by the mysterious vampire from earlier, and drugs her, deciding he'd deal with Jubilee his way, not the X-Men's way.

Thoughts: I personally would have enjoyed this issue WAY more if it actually focused more on Wolvie and Jubilee's relationship, as opposed to Jubilee's relationship with everybody else. I don't care what Armor thinks of Jubilee, hell, I don't even like Armor! I brought this comic because I've always enjoyed Wolvie and Jubilee's relationship. So this issue itself didn't do it for me. With that said, I'm expecting the next issue to take this mini to the next level, since it looks like Wolvie will be taking Jubilee away from Crazy Mutie Island and helping her deal with her problems personally. That's what I was hoping from this issue, but better late than never I guess...

Score: 6 out of 10."Hey good looking, can I buy you a dri... Oookay, never mind!"