A Very Punisher Christmas

Nothing says "Merry Christmas" like battery acid to the eyes!

No Comic Day...

Well, school did wind up getting canceled for me due to snow and(mainly)ice, which is similar to what like 1/3 of the country got buried under. Needless to say, I'm not going to head outside into what looks like a damn hockey rink to get my comics today. I'm crazy, but not THAT crazy! So most likely I'll pick up my comics on either Thursday or Friday, and put up a weather delayed New Comics Day post then. Since today should be a rather quiet day, hopefully I'll be able to post at least one Quick Hits post, as well as a regular review. Hopefully... Since that's pretty much all I have to mention right now, I'll throw up not one, not three, but TWO Random Comic Scans and call this post a wrap. Until next time, X out.What can I say, I thought this scene was funny.

Punisher killing Dr. Doom??? Um, I don't think so...

Retro-Review: Punisher/Batman: Deadly Knights #1(1994)

Review: We get this comic underway with the Punisher shooting up a warehouse in Gotham City. How did we get to this point you ask? Well, it seems that Jigsaw(one of the Punisher's FEW reoccurring enemies)has stayed in Gotham since the last Punisher/Batman crossover, and Punisher has finally returned to Gotham to take care of Jigsaw, once and for all. After killing most of the goons in the warehouse, Punisher corners one and demands to know if the thug had heard anything about Jigsaw. The thug claims innocence, so Punisher decides to kill the thug, since he wasn't offering any decent information. Before he can pull the trigger, Batman hops in the way and Punisher and Bats get into a scuffle. While the two heroes are fighting, the thug gets out of Dodge. Ultimately, the warehouse collapses, which separates Bats and Punisher, allowing Punisher a way out. From there we catch up with the thug from earlier, who rushes to Jigsaw and tells him that Punisher was looking for him. Jigsaw seems fine with that, since he was working with Joker(!), and Punisher coming after him in Gotham simply saves Jigsaw the trouble of hunting Punisher down back in New York. After Joker kills the thug(because that's what he does), we find out that Joker was helping Jigsaw familiarize himself with the way the Gotham underworld worked, with the endgame resulting in Jigsaw taking over the entire Gotham City underworld. As for Joker, he's simply helping Jigsaw because it would lead to widespread gang warfare and carnage in Gotham. After some sleuthing, Batman and Punisher both discover that Joker and Jigsaw were planning on making a move on a rival mobster at a Gotham nightclub, which leads to both heroes heading towards the building. By the time they arrive, Joker has directed Jigsaw and his men to open fire on the rival mobster's crew, leading to a massive gunfight in the club. Punisher arrives first and is pleased to discover a roomful of mobsters and maniacs, meaning he could simply open fire at will. Batman arrives and has to try to halt the shooting, while preventing Punisher from killing anybody. After an extended battle, Joker tries to flee, but is followed by the Punisher, while Batman confronts Jigsaw and gets shot pointblank in the chest. Jigsaw celebrates the fact that he killed Batman, but his celebration is premature as Bats gets up and beats Jigsaw unconscious... Guess Jigsaw never heard of body armor... While Bats is taking care of business, Joker has managed to escape outside, where it appears that he'd be able to beat a hasty retreat from the Punisher. At least he was until he slips on a banana peel(?!)and falls down in an alley, losing his gun in the process. Punisher approaches Joker and prepares to execute the Clown Prince of Crime, but is stopped by the timely arrival of Batman. Batman hooks Punisher's arms and tells Joker to run away, which Joker happily does. With that, Punisher and Batman go at it again, and Batman easily tosses the injured Punisher aside. Batman gives Punisher one opportunity to leave Gotham, warning him that if he refused to, Batman would put the Punisher in Blackgate Prison or Arkham Asylum personally. With no real recourse, Punisher gets up and walks away, swearing that he'd never again step foot in Gotham City.

Thoughts: You know, I liked this comic. It was basically a fast paced, all-action, mile a minute thrill-ride. There really wasn't much of a story besides “Jigsaw and Joker team-up, while Punisher tries to kill them and Batman tries to arrest them.” but that worked well in this comic. It was one of those comics where you could basically turn off your brain and just enjoy the ride. So Chuck Dixon took care of his end by providing us a fun story, and John Romita Jr. didn't disappoint with his take on the Joker... I don't know if I can remember JRJR ever doing the art on a comic with the Joker in it, but man did I enjoy his take on Mistah J! The first scene where Joker enters the comic might just be one of my favorite Joker drawings ever. So great art, plus a fun, mindless story gets a big thumbs up from me!

Score: 7 1/2 out of 10.Batman must really enjoy having a difficult life...

A LAZY look at Dark Reign The List: Punisher #1

Writer: Rick Remender. Pencils: John Romita Jr.

Score: 7 out of 10.

What I Thought(In 150 words or less!): Woooo, what a mess this was! Long story short, the Punisher pisses Norman "Marvel" Osborn off one time too many and Normie sends Daken to take care of Punisher... Permanently. Daken does just that, cutting Punisher into a dozen or so pieces. The fight scene between Daken and Punisher was intense, but the ending and upcoming Punisher as a zombie/monster storyline just seems ridiculous! "Franken-castle"? Really?!? Then again, it sounds SO bad that I might actually pick it up out of morbid curiosity, so what does that say about my taste?Ouch, that's going to take a MIGHTY big band-aid to fix...

Punisher #2

Overall- Much like most of the Marvel comic books coming out nowadays, this issue just didn't do it for me. Plot wise, the Punisher meets his mystery helper from last issue. The mystery helper tells Frank that his name is Henry, and that he realizes Norman Osborn is really a bad guy, not the hero he's been portrayed as since Secret Invasion... Must Norman Osborn appear in EVERY Marvel comic? I thought it was Wolverine's job to show up in every Marvel comic book. What gives? Anyway, Henry offers to help Frank take down the bad guys, and plans on collecting enough information to prove that Norman Osborn is still a villain. Frank takes Henry up on his offer and the two begin a plan to discredit Osborn.

Osborn has been making the rounds on TV, telling everybody that since he has taken control of SHIELD and formed HAMMER, the crime rate has dipped severely. With the assistance of Henry, who has hacked into several cameras across NYC, Frank goes around killing pimps, terrorists, murderers, etc. After killing the baddies, Frank photographs the grisly scenes and has Henry send the photos to several media outlets. The photos prove that crime is still running rampant in NYC and that Osborn was blatantly lying about the crime rate falling dramatically. Needless to say, Normie is pissed and sends the Hood to deal with Punisher.

Actually, this wasn't a horrible comic book, it's just hard for me to really invest that much interest in the Punisher anymore. I've always been a big fan of Frank, but this comic is going TOTALLY the wrong way. Why do we have Frank going after Osborn? Let's face facts, nothing important is going to happen in this comic book. Frank isn't going to kill Norman, the Hood, or any "main" villain in the Marvel Universe. Honestly, he's just not important enough. I already know that Frank is never going to bust Osborn. When Osborn is finally busted, it's going to come in either a BENDIS written book, or the next big Marvel event. It sure as hell isn't going to happen in a Punisher comic!

A Punisher comic works best when Frank is dealing with street trash, or very low level super-villains, I'm talking Stilt-Man/Bushwacker types. Give Frank opponents more fitting to his world, the street world. Frank Castle is never going to save the world, or defeat Dr. Doom, so why have him deal with crap like that. For a score, I'll give this comic a 6 1/2 out of 10. Like I said, this wasn't a bad comic, it just can't possibly lead anywhere. Frank should be spending his time gunning down mobsters, not trying to prevent Norman Osborn's plots for world domination.

Quick thoughts on Punisher #1

OK, so this is like the 1,000,000th Punisher series Marvel has decided to publish. I swear, I probably have 6 or 7 different Punisher #1's amongst my collection! Maybe Marvel would be better suited to either stick Frank in a book where he can serve as a supporting character or put him on a team or something, because I don't think there is a large enough fanbase to support a Punisher solo series. Anyway, enough belly-aching, here's what I thought about Frank Castle's 1,000,000th series.

Overall- HAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Holy S###! I'm sure glad I got this comic through my subscription with Marvel as opposed to buying it at a comic shop! The cover price of this comic was $3.99, and before I even opened it I could tell by it's size that this issue was 48 pages long. So, OK, cool, this is going to be an extra size issue. Makes sense considering this is a #1. However, the actual story of this comic was 22 pages! Think about that for a moment. Out of a 48 page comic book, which cost $3.99, there was only 22 pages of new materiel! F###ing Marvel! Besides the 22 page main story, the rest of this comic was filled with a few pages detailing Punisher's origin(as if I didn't know his origin by now...)followed by that same goddamn preview of "Agents of Atlas" Marvel has been sticking in the back of pretty much EVERY Marvel comic I've read lately. You know, out of spite I'll NEVER read one single issue of "Agents of Atlas" now. I'm that sick and tired of seeing the same preview over and over again!

Sorry to go off like that, but I had to get that off my chest. The actual Punisher story itself was OK, and detailed Frank trying to assassinate Norman Osborn, only to be thwarted by the Sentry. Frank flees from the Sentry and ultimately manages to escape, thanks to a mystery man who phoned Frank and told him where to go. The issue ends with Frank evading the Sentry, but collapsing due to the injuries he suffered during the escape.

For the record, I've ALWAYS hated the Sentry, and see him as nothing more than a boring Superman ripoff. I've never understood why Marvel/Brian Bendis has been so infatuated with the Sentry. So needless to say, I wasn't happy to see him show up in this comic book. After everything is said and done, at the end of the day, I'd give this comic a 6 1/2 out of 10 for the story. But, I'd give Marvel a 0 out of 10 for setting the price of this comic at $3.99 when you only get 22 pages of original story... That's just wrong.