A Quick Look At... June 6th's new releases.

So I just got home from work a few minutes ago and cooked myself a pizza. I have a few minutes before the pizza cools, so now is as good as any time to break out the first “A Quick Look At...” post of the week. Since I have 8 books left to blog about, I'll do four for this post and leave four for the next post(which will probably be up tomorrow). For this week, I figured I'd go up to THREE whole sentences for each comic! I know, crazy!! Okay, enough talk, I have a pizza waiting for me, so let's get to this...

Stormwatch #10: This was the second issue written by Peter Milligan, and much like the prior issue, it was pretty good. I'm not sure where he's going with Apollo and Midnighter(since I thought it was already established they were gay, although maybe Midnighter hasn't come out yet?), but I was glad to see the guy who betrayed the team(whose name escapes me at the moment...) and Projectionist pop up here. This was another one-and-done type of issue, but as long as the stories are good, I'm fine with that format.
Score: 7 1/2 out of 10.

Morning Glories #19: This was a weird comic... It was all about Hunter being chased through the woods by a knife-wielding Zoe, who knew WAY more about Hunter's life then you'd think she should have. In the end Zoe was shot by some weirdos, which did indeed piss me off since I really like Zoe.
Score: 7 out of 10.

Invincible Iron Man #518: A LOT went on in this issue, including War Machine(who everybody thinks is dead) acting as the new Iron Man, Tony Stark publicly declaring that he was no longer Iron Man(for the ten-thousandth time), Sasha Hammer being attacked by the crazed Detroit Steel, Spymaster still trying to kill the Stark Resilient staff and Ezekiel Stane telling the Mandarin that he was no longer the Mandarin's slave... Whew. The downside of all that stuff going on is that no one thing was really focused on, so this issue was kind of a blur.
Score: 7 out of 10.

X-Factor #237: Polaris and Siryn/Banshee decide to take Wolfsbane on a road trip in order to perk Wolfsbane up. After failing, they take her to Reverend Madrox, who does get through to Wolfsbane, at which point Wolfsbane decides that she wanted to find her abandoned child. That was a great thing to read, because I am SO curious about Wolfsbane's child, and think the kid has HUGE potential. Oh, and this was a fun read, as usual. And yes, I know that took me over my 3 sentences or less decree... But hey, rules(especially mine) are made to be broken!
Score: 8 out of 10.

Okay, I think I've burned enough time for my pizza to cool off, until later, Vampire X out!

Invincible Iron Man #517

Last issue Tony Stark decided he was done with being Iron Man. This issue? Well, I guess we'll find out in a few...

Invincible Iron Man #517:

Story Points:
-We open with Tony Stark, the elder Hammer girl and General Babbage going to see Reed Richards to remove the Iron Man components from Tony's body.
-Reed isn't pleased to do it, but he does.
-So that's it, Tony Stark no longer has the Iron Man tech in his body...
-Spy-Master sneaks around trying to kill members of Stark Resilient but is confronted by Tony's head of security, Bethany Cabe.
-Cabe alerts Tony of what was going down, and he tells Reed that he had some back-up Iron Man tech he needed put in him... I think...
-Detroit Steel breaks into the home of the younger Hammer girl and menaces her.
-Ezekiel Stane manages to remove the bomb the Mandarin put in his chest.
-This one ends with somebody in a new suit of Iron Man armor(Rhodey?) doing hero stuff.

Thoughts: Matt Fraction is doing a great job of slowly moving all of the pieces around the chessboard here... Stane has freed himself from the threats of the Mandarin, without the Mandarin knowing, Tony has freed himself from the eyes of the government since he relinquished the Iron Man tech to them, while still maintaining the pieces necessary to turn him back into IM again, we got some more stuff with Spy-Master, and there was another Iron Man flitting around at the end of this one. This was a very good read.

Score: 8 1/2 out of 10.

Invincible Iron Man #516

Well, after that first review of the night, this comic doesn't really have a lot to live up to...

Invincible Iron Man #516:

Summary: During a battle with Firebrand and Crimson Dynamo, Iron Man's armor gets shut down by Justine Hammer so she could have the villains defeated by her Detroit Steel Corps. The Avengers offer Tony some assistance with his recent string of troubles, but Tony refuses any help and takes a hiatus from the Avengers. Meanwhile, Ezekiel Stane shows off the death-machine he built for the Mandarin. The death-machine fails so Mandarin beats the hell out of Stane, while Stane is unable to move a muscle to defend himself. It's then that Stane realizes that the Mandarin had done something to his mind and he decides he was going to find out what that something was. We finally discover who Spymaster was masquerading as, Pim from Stark Resilient, who murders his lover on the orders of Justine Hammer, who had decided it was time for Spymaster to come out of hiding. This issue ends with Tony barging into General Babbage's office to inform Babbage that he had won and that Tony was going to quit being Iron Man.

Thoughts: This issue wasn't that bad. It wasn't great, but it wasn't bad either. It was the definition of an okay comic. Tony quit being Iron Man, which puts the ball in the court of the Hammer girls and Babbage, Stane is trying to figure out a way to mutiny against the Mandarin after the beating he received, Spymaster was finally revealed, a lot happened to set up future events. I'm most curious to see where the whole, “Iron Man no more!” thing is going to go out of all the story elements Matt Fraction put into motion here. I mean we know Tony's still going to be doing the Iron Man thing, I'll be curious to see how he manages to hide it from the Hammers and Babbage.

Score: 7 out of 10.

Oh Mandarin... You so crazy!

Invincible Iron Man #515

I have to say, I've been enjoying the hell out of this series for the longest time now... Iron Man has gone from a character I didn't care much about, to one I loathed(after Civil War), to one that I actually like. And this series has gone a long way in changing my opinion of Tony Stark, so kudos to Matt Fraction for that. As for this issue? Here's hoping it's as good as the past few issues have been.

Invincible Iron Man #515:

Summary: With the Iron Man suit shut down thanks to one o the Hammer girls and General Babbage, Tony Stark is unable to assist War Machine against the trio of Melter, Whirlwind and the Living Laser. Pepper Potts decides to put her Rescue suit back on to assist War Machine, but ends up being too late as the villains kill(!!!!!) Rhodey! By this time, Tony has arrived on the scene(after getting a lift from his head of security, Bethany Cabe, but there's nothing for him to do. Meanwhile, Babbage has invited the Hammers and the Mandarin to the Pentagon(!?). Back with Tony, he accompanies Rhodey's body in the ambulance and after getting passed the throngs of witnesses and media, Rhodey reveals he was only playing dead... Whew... Since Tony now knows that the Mandarin, Ezekiel Stane, the Hammers and Babbage are conspiring against him, he realizes he needs to change up his strategy. As such, he now has War Machine in the background ready to strike the unsuspecting villains when the time is right(since they think he's dead), as well as the fact that Tony admitted at an AA meeting that he had a relapse, something else the villains almost definitely didn't expect Tony to do. So while the villains have won the opening salvo in the war, Tony is just getting warmed up.

Thoughts: Okay, first the bad. I am so pissed that Melter appears to have devolved into your common, dime a dozen villain. I always felt he was better than that. So yeah, that annoyed me. Going into this issue, I didn't expect Rhodey to die, because he's all over several other books... I mean he's in AvX, he's in Secret Avengers, etc. But yep, I TOTALLY brought his death when I read this one! That's some good writing from Fraction, because like I said, I was sure Rhodey wasn't going to die, but Fraction got me here... He tricked me but good! Overall? As usual, this was a strong, above average read. Par for the course with this series.

Score: 8 out of 10.

RHODEY!!!!!!

Invincible Iron Man #514

Ah, here's another series that's been quietly really good lately, Iron Man. Matt Fraction has been doing a great job of taking Tony's life apart in this storyline, let's see what happens to old Shellhead this issue.

Invincible Iron Man #514:

Summary: Just to mess with the government, Iron Man sends 19 massive trucks full of records of his actions in the Iron Man suit since General Babbage wanted to see Iron Man's records to prove that Tony had piloted the IM armor while intoxicated. From there, the Mandarin prepares his next attack on Iron Man, this time using Whirlwind and the new Melter... This is where ominous music would play... Back with Tony, Babbage and Justine Hammer visit and tell Tony to wear a special piece of tech that would basically serve as a Breathalyzer. If Tony is “unwell”(and that's an important choice of word for later in this comic), the piece of tech would shut down Tony's access to the armor and weaponry of the Iron Man suit, but wouldn't interfere with it's life support systems. The two hand Tony the tech, tell him to look into it on his own, and that if he chooses to wear it Babbage would drop the government's inquiry into Tony's drunken actions. Eventually Tony does decide to put the tech on, and ends up battling Whirlwind, while Melter attacks a street in Los Angeles a short distance away. Tony manages to put Whirlwind down and upon hearing about Melter, prepares to head after him, but is shocked when his armor shuts down. Hammer tells him that after his battle with Whirlwind, they(Hammer and Babbage) had decided to enforce a mandatory cool-down period for Tony. This issue ends with Melter being confronted by War Machine, apparently sent to take Melter down at the behest of Babbage.

Thoughts: Nice... Things are really starting to kick into high gear as the noose around Tony's neck gets ever tighter. Before I get too into this issue though, I do want to say that I hate the fact that Melter is the bad guy here, and will almost definitely be doing severe damage(or worse...) to Rhodey next issue... I thought he had some potential during that Dark Reign: Young Avengers mini-series, and hate to see him turned into your basic, run of the mill, super-villain. Back to this issue though... Fraction has done a fantastic job of basically having ALL of Tony's foes come at him from ALL sides(the Mandarin and Stane, along with ALL of their lackeys, as well as the Hammer girls and Babbage) at the same time. Now, it seems definite that War Machine is going to catch a major league ass-whipping(or worse...) next issue, with Tony just scant miles away, unable to do anything to help. That should light the fire even more under Tony, leading to an eventual confrontation with the Mandarin, as well as a reckoning with Babbage and the Hammer girls as well. Man, Fraction has set this series up for like a full YEAR of awesome storytelling!

Score: 8 out of 10.

Oh Melter... I expected more from you...

Invincible Iron Man #513

First up today is Iron Man. This issue should continue advancing the Mandarin's plans, while making Tony Stark's life a living hell... In other words, good stuff!

Invincible Iron Man #513:

Summary: Iron Man attacks the Dreadnoughts that were attacking the Three Gorges Dam in China, hoping to prevent the Dreadnoughts from destroying the dam and flooding the surrounding countryside. IM is soon joined by the Dynasty, which is the Chinese equivalent of the Avengers. IM and the Dynasty do what they can, but the Dreadnoughts change their strategy up and begin simply slamming into the dam, blowing themselves up while inflicting massive damage to the dam. War Machine arrives on the scene to assist and joins in the fight against the Dreadnoughts, at least until the Dynasty get word from the Chinese government that the heroes were all to vacate the area so the Chinese military could attack. IM naturally doesn't want to leave, since that would allow the Dreadnoughts to destroy the dam before the Chinese military arrived, but War Machine reminds IM that they were in China, and as such, had to obey the way the Chinese wanted to handle the attack. With that, IM grabs the head of a Dreadnought and heads towards a US military airplane to head back to the States. Before boarding, IM decides he wanted to fly back to the US alone to help clear his head, but is told by War Machine that the US government was requesting(actually demanding) that IM return to the US to be questioned regarding his recent actions. With nothing else to do on the flight home, IM dissects the Dreadnought head and upon studying it, realizes that it had been created using a combination of Stane and Mandarin technology, meaning two of IM's worst enemies had banded together against him. Speaking of Stane and the Mandarin, they prepare the second phase of their plan against Iron Man, and this issue ends with the Mandarin addressing 11(!!) of Iron Man's foes.

Thoughts: Wooo, poor old Tony is getting it from all sides, isn't he?! This was a really enjoyable comic that moved along at a very brisk pace. Once again, Tony basically failed against a threat, which, again, left him looking poorly in the eyes of the world. Add what should be a tongue-lashing(if not something more severe) upcoming from General Babbage, as well as the Mandarin preparing to launch the second phase of his operation to destroy Tony, and the next issue should be chock full of awesomeness.

Score: 8 out of 10.

War Machine is so awesome! He really needs a series of his own! Oh wait......

A Quick Look At... Invincible Iron Man #512

Um, what's next... Ah, Iron Man. Or Invincible Iron Man. Whatever. Let's get to it!

Invincible Iron Man #512:

What Happened: After his defeat at the hands of Living Laser last issue, Iron Man gets brought to the hospital, but forcefully refuses treatment since he didn't want the emergency room staff to screw with his damaged repulsor unit. Meanwhile, the Mandarin pushes Ezekiel Stane around, demanding Stane readies the Dreadnoughts for an attack on China. Stane is pissed. Back with Tony, he hangs out with Anthem in a coffee shop until a cop shows up to arrest(?) Tony for his actions in Times Square and the emergency room the prior night. Tony flies the coop. From there, Blizzard and Living Laser complain about the way Mandarin had been treating them, and contemplate attacking him. Damn lackeys... Next, General Babbage complains that as a drunk, Tony shouldn't have possession of the Iron Man armor. Finally, the Dreadnoughts attack China.

Thoughts: I enjoyed this issue. We had a lot of characters show up, and a lot of pieces move around the chess board. I'm still not sure what Mandarin's endgame is(how does attacking China ruin Tony Stark?), but I did like seeing that Mandarin's lackeys were plotting against him. It's little stuff like that that really helps enhance a comic book's story for me.

Score: 8 out of 10.

I have to admit, Matt Fraction has been doing a great job writing the Mandarin.

Invincible Iron Man #511

I managed to get the three reviews I'll be posting tonight finished up yesterday since I wasn't sure if I'd be able to post any new reviews today with it being Christmas and all... Am I a swell guy or what? Yeah, I know... “Or what”... Anyway, here's the first review of the night, the hopefully drawfless Iron Man.

Invincible Iron Man #511:

What Happened: Zeke Stane and the Mandarin notice that Iron Man's chest repulsor was damaged, and had remained damaged since Fear Itself ended, causing the two villains to think that they may have finally found a chink in Iron Man's armor... Literally. To take advantage of this they change up their original plans and send Living Lightning to attack Tony. Lightning catches up with Tony over Manhattan and the two battle, with Lightning focusing on Tony's damaged chest repulsor. Lightning manages to damage it more, causing several of Tony's systems to shutdown, which results in Tony crashing in the middle of Times Square. Meanwhile, Sasha Hammer takes over the Detroit Steel suit since she figured the original pilot was dead(he's not anymore thanks to Odin), Spymaster is told his time inside Stark Resilient was coming to an end and Bethany Cabe and Pepper Parks talk out their differences.

The Good: The fight scene between Iron Man and Living Lightning was well done. The cliffhanger was good. We finally seem to be getting towards the endgame with regards to who Spymaster was impersonating in Stark Resilient. I like Mandarin operating as a puppet master with not only Iron Man, but with his own cronies. It really helps show you the pecking order of Iron Man's enemies.

The Bad: I can't say anything all THAT interesting happened here... While it's good that we're getting towards the end of the Spymaster/Stark Resilient thing, I don't really care enough about anybody in the company to want to take a guess at who Spymaster has been impersonating. That damn dwarf was in this issue.

The Verdict: Meh. This was an okay comic, but that's all it was. I mean it killed a few minutes and all, but it's not something I'll look back on with warm, fuzzy memories.

Score: 6 1/2 out of 10.That's gonna leave a mark!

Invincible Iron Man #510

And this series is finally done with the Fear Itself tie-ins! Huzzah!!! Hopefully we get back to the good Iron Man action that we were getting prior to the Fear stuff. We'll see, I guess...

Invincible Iron Man #510:

Summary: Ezekiel Stane, on the order of the Mandarin, sends Blizzard to destroy desalination plants in the Abu Dhabi, thus robbing the citizens of Abu Dhabi of water. Meanwhile, Tony Stark tosses all of the Odin enchanted weapons(except for Red She-Hulk's sword) into a cauldron in Svartalfheim, destroying them all. From there Tony takes his little dwarf friend Splitlip back to Earth and goes to an AA meeting with Splitlip, who wanted to stop drinking... Yes, this really happened. While at the meeting, Tony gets word that agents of AIM were stealing some tech and were firing at the police, so he heads off to assist. Tony manages to stop the AIM agents and their van full of goodies, but takes a spill during the battle, which is actually important to the story, believe it or not. The cops go to arrest the AIM agents, but they, at Stane's command, explode, leaving Tony shocked and confused. A bit later, Tony returns to the AA meeting to pick up his dwarf, and while driving home, Tony spots a gorgeous woman standing by her disabled car. Being a good samaritan(and notorious man-whore), Tony heads out to help the woman, who hands him a subpoena... HA! Apparently, somebody knew Tony had taken a few drinks while working with the dwarfs, and wanted the biometric readings from his suit from the past thirty days. With that, we head back to the Mandarin and Stane, who are patting each other on the back over how well their plans have been moving along. The Mandarin reveals that he was declaring war not just on Tony, but on the United States, and proudly shows a newspaper headline from the Daily Bugle, depicting Tony crashing into the ground during the prior night's battle with the AIM agents with a headline that simply stated, “Drunk!”

Thoughts: Ah the good old Daily Bugle and their headlines... You'd think they'd have gotten more classy after JJJ became mayor, but I guess not. This comic was a great set-up issue. It moved briskly, and the story is pretty simple... The Mandarin is out to ruin Tony(again) and along with another one of Tony's enemies(Stane) is willing to go further than ever before. Personally, I'm delighted to see the Mandarin here, as he's probably the most well rounded villain in Iron Man's rogue gallery. Sure, I could do without the dwarf, since it adds NOTHING to the series, but what can ya do? For the most part this was a really good issue, one that has me interested in this storyline, dwarf or not.

Score: 8 out of 10.That's right, Tony, you got served!!

Invincible Iron Man #509

Another day, another Fear Itself tie-in comic to read. Not that that's a bad thing, mind you, just an observation. Hey, it could be worse, I could be suffering through a DC comic!

Invincible Iron Man #509(Fear Itself tie-in):

Summary: Not really anything new here... Iron Man gathers his Odin-enchanted weapons and prepares to head to Earth for the final battle against the Serpent. He stops some dwarfs from killing smoke elves and learns one of the dwarfs is an alcoholic... I can't believe I just typed that line... Anyway, Pepper Potts survives against the Grey Gargoyle thanks to the Gargoyle being summoned to the Serpent's side for the final battle. Pepper eventually catches a UN plane back to the States and is informed that somebody had released footage of her in her Rescue armor crying at her desk with a bottle of booze within camera shot... D'oh!

Thoughts: There wasn't really anything wrong with this comic, it just didn't do anything for me. I never really cared about Tony and the dwarfs, so that part of the story didn't interest me, and the Pepper reveal mainly just made me laugh... I mean seriously, the world is ending, Washington, New York, Paris and several other cities have been decimated, the Serpent is floating across the country, the Worthy are destroying everything in their path, and the news reports are showing Pepper Parks crying in her office?!? Really?!?! I'd think there were more important things to talk about, the impending end of humanity being one of them, but I guess Pepper crying was more newsworthy than that doom and gloom end of the world business... So yeah, that was pretty dumb. Next issue wraps up this series' involvement with Fear Itself, and to be quite honest, I'm glad, because while the Iron Man/Fear Itself stuff started out VERY strong, it really petered out towards the end.

Score: 5 1/2 out of 10.Hey look, it's Hawkeye!

Invincible Iron Man #508

The next couple of posts will be all Marvel, all the time, so Marvelites rejoice! First up is what I've got to believe is the penultimate Fear Itself x-over issue of Iron Man.

Invincible Iron Man #508(Fear Itself tie-in):

Summary: Let's get the Pepper Potts/Sasha Hammer/Grey Gargoyle stuff out of the way first so I can tackle the Tony Stark portion of this comic uninterrupted. Hammer orders her men to attack the Gargoyle against Pepper's warnings since the Gargoyle had already beat the hell out of Iron Man and as such Pepper knew Hammer's mercenaries didn't have a chance at toppling the Gargoyle. Needless to say, the Gargoyle marches through Hammer's men, so Pepper jumps in and tries to buy Hammer's men some time to regroup. Unfortunately for Pepper, once Hammer's men get clear, Hammer orders an immediate retreat(against the wishes of her men, who want to help Pepper for assisting them). As Hammer and her armor-plated goons fly off, Gargoyle rips Pepper's helmet off and stares at her. Pepper figures she was safe as long as she didn't look at the Gargoyle, so the Gargoyle patiently tells her he could wait. As for Tony, he manages to defeat the magic golem that attacked him last issue with the help of his dwarf friends. The dwarfs want to celebrate by drinking, but Tony finally turns the dwarf's drink down. From there we get a replay of the stuff that happened in Fear Itself #6 with Odin arriving to empower the weapons Tony and the dwarfs had created.

Thoughts: This issue was a good read, but there's really not all that much more that can happen in this series without giving away too much in the main Fear Itself comic. For example, we KNOW Tony doesn't lose his armor or his life to the golem here since he had both in Fear Itself #6 when Odin came to visit. So the stuff with Tony really didn't do much for me since it was all a forgone conclusion anyway. As for the parts with Pepper and Hammer, I both liked and didn't like them... I enjoyed Hammer arrogantly having her men attack the Gargoyle since that move fits her character so well, while I really didn't like the scene after the Gargoyle popped off Pepper's helmet... First off, I can't imagine that the Gargoyle managed to make eye contact with EVERY person in Paris... His powers had to have been amplified to have turned the entire city to stone you'd think. Besides that, why the hell does the god who possessed Gargoyle(whatever his wacky Asgardian name is) simply snap Pepper's neck and be done with it? Seriously, why does he HAVE to turn her to stone? Dude, you've proven you could beat up Iron Man WITH his armor on... Why not just pop Pepper's head off and move on? So while I did have a few gripes here and there, for the most part I enjoyed this comic, thus the score you see below.

Score: 8 out of 10.Um, I think there are several ways he could kill you besides simply looking at you, Pepper...

Quick Hits: Invincible Iron Man #507, Venom #6, Avengers #16 & Fear Itself: The Home Front #5

Hey there X-Maniacs. I bizarrely decided to pick up Marvel: Ultimate Alliance 2 the other day, and I'll be damned if I'm not enjoying the hell out of it! When it first came out a few years back I was put off by the whole Civil War storyline(being an unrepentant Captain America mark and all), but after playing it I have to say, even with the Civil War junk surrounding it, it's not bad! I just finished the first playthrough today(I was anti-registration, naturally), and figure I'll start the second go-round tomorrow... Which is kinda/sorta a problem for the blog... See, if I spend my free time playing comic book based video games, I don't have that much time to read and review actual comic books... And that's why I'm going back to the old, lazy X standby, Quick Hits! I'll do 4 Marvel reviews tonight, 4 DC reviews tomorrow, and... something on Monday. I don't really know. Meh, I'll know when I get there. So there you have it. Now, on to the shoddy, half-assed “reviews”!

The Invincible Iron Man #507(Fear Itself tie-in):

What Happened: We're following two stories here, one dealing with Pepper Parks(as Rescue) running afoul one of the Hammer girls in Paris. I don't know which one. Hammer tells her armor-clad goons to attack Pepper, which causes the Serpent possessed Grey Gargoyle to wander over, squash one of Hammer's goons(causing the others to run away... HA!), and snatch Pepper and the Hammer girl. The other story deals with Tony Stark and those damned, drunken, treacherous dwarfs. One of the dwarfs betrays his fellow dwarfs(as well as Tony and Odin) by making a deal with one of the Serpent's henchmen. The dwarf gives the Serpent's henchman a piece of Tony's hair, and the Serpent's goon(after killing the dwarf), creates an evil, magical Tony golem, which promptly attacks half-drunk Tony.

Thoughts: Well, I've definitely read better issues of this series. This was the first Invincible Iron Man/Fear Itself tie-in that just didn't do it for me. The pacing seemed off, and Tony spent the whole issue hanging out with dwarfs... Seeing as that I've always hated dwarfs, that's a bit of a problem. Oh well, hopefully things will pick back up again next issue as we race towards the conclusion of Fear Itself.

Score: 6 1/2 out of 10.Yeah, that's not gonna work...


Venom #6(Spider-Island tie-in):

What Happened: The Jackal sends one of his mutated spider-creatures to break through the quarantine Mayor Jameson had put Manhattan under. Venom arrives on the scene and helps Gravity and Firestar take the creature down(glad to see those two are still hanging out after the cancellation of the Young Allies series). Venom brings the creature back to base, which is exactly what it wanted. It proceeds to break out of the tube it was placed in and runs amok, at least until Flash is able to re-bond with the Venom symbiote and take the creature down. The army now locks the creature in something more secure than a tube, and discover that the creature was actually Steve Rogers?!

Thoughts: This issue definitely deserved better than a Quick Hits review. It was really good! As usual. It seems that the Spider-books are really bringing the awesome these past couple of months. The story was really good, the art matched the strong story, the dialogue was solid, and the tie-in to Spider-Island wasn't huge, but was enough to justify the “Spider-Island” logo on this issue... Unlike about 70% of the Fear Itself tie-ins that have NOTHING to do with the main Fear story. The Steve Rogers reveal at the end was kind of strange, but I figure the Jackal managed to get a hold of Steve's DNA and made a creepy spider-clone, since that's what he does.

Score: 8 1/2 out of 10.And Steve thought losing Bucky again was bad!


Avengers #16(Fear Itself tie-in):

What Happened: Steve Rogers(with Bucky's shield but not in Captain America garb), Sharon Carter, Maria Hill(who I hate) and Victoria Hand(who I simply dislike) head to a castle in Sweden on some intelligence stating that Sin was there... Even though we know Sin is either in Washington DC, New York City, or Dayton, Ohio... That last location still puzzles me, but whatever, the point is that Steve is apparently an idiot. Needless to say, Steve and the ladies walk into a trap and run afoul Master Man and the Exiles(the Red Skull version, not the reality hopping version). Before Steve and his women can fully defeat the Nazis, Daisy Johnson(really?!?) arrives on the scene and topples the castle. Steve is pissed that Sin hadn't been there, but come on, he should have known better!

Thoughts: My thoughts on this comic can be summed up in one word... Meh. This comic wasn't actively horrible or anything, it just wasn't necessary. Seriously, how could Steve POSSIBLY think Sin was in Sweden? Did he think that she attacked DC, headed to NYC(after a quick pit stop in Dayton), and then figured, “What the hey, I'm gonna cool my heels in my castle in Sweden for a bit, and then I'll head back to NYC to continue with the whole, 'spreading fear!!' thing.” The logic here was a bit wonky, which I can forgive if the story was a) really good, or b) furthered something. This comic didn't accomplish either of those. The story was mediocre, and Steve is sad over Bucky's death. We get that. The sooner Bendis gets away from the Fear Itself tie-ins the better, because this series was WAY better before the crossovers began.

Score: 6 out of 10.This is the best dialogued page Bendis has EVER done!!


Fear Itself: The Home Front #5(of 7):

What Happened: Great. THIS comic... Last issue St. John's, Newfoundland was buried under waves of water by Attuma after Attuma defeated Speedball. This issue the people of St. John's help each other out, which is inspiring to Speedball. He decides to take a video of the people to show the world that even after being drowned, those hearty Canadians weren't afraid(yes, really!). Speedball sends the video back to Miriam Sharpe in Stanford, Connecticut, who posts it online to show that there were people who WEREN'T scared of the Serpent. The Sisters of Sin see the video and decide to teach Miriam fear or something. The second story included Amadeus Cho, who I hate more than any other comic book character NOT named Barry Allen, which says a lot! As such, I didn't read it. The third story dealt with Mr. Fear who seemed bummed that he wasn't the one spreading fear, while the last story starred some guy named American Eagle...

Thoughts: This was about as bad a comic as I've read all month. Usually the first story, the Speedball one, carries this comic for me, while the other three stories range from lackluster to god-awful. The problem here was that the Speedball story was really bad. Since the first story started me off on the wrong foot, and the second story had Amadeus Cho in it, this comic was sunk for me. I just couldn't get into the Speedball story at all. What the hell was the point of Robbie staying in St. John's to play cameraman? If the people were taking care of themselves(plus Jocasta was there helping too), shouldn't he be elsewhere, doing something useful?! Robbie bravely standing up to Juggernaut or battling Attuma was what I enjoyed about the first four issues of this mini. This issue? I'm keeping my fingers crossed that it was only a one issue aberration, but I don't think it's going to get any better with the next issue probably giving us the epic showdown the world has been clamoring to see, the Sisters of Sin vs Miriam Sharpe...

Score: 1 1/2 out of 10.Help the drowning people or videotape them... Hmm, if I was a hero, I know which move I'D make...

Invincible Iron Man #506 & Ultimate Fallout #2

Hey there all, two reviews to kick off the start of the comic week. The first comic I'll be looking at is this week's top pick, Iron Man #506. I could have went with another Fear Itself book for comic #2, since I have about 5,000 of them to read this week, but instead I'll go with Ultimate Fallout #2. The first issue got a perfect score out of me, hopefully this'll be a repeat performance...

Invincible Iron Man #506(Fear Itself tie-in):

Summary: The story here is twofold, and I've got to say, both parts are pretty damn good! But that's for the “Thoughts” section, let's hit the review first! The main story involves Odin taking pity on Tony Stark after he offered his two most important things to Odin(since those gods do like their sacrifices), his dignity(since he was kneeling on the ground begging for Odin's assistance) and his sobriety. Odin reveals himself to Stark, and Tony asks for Odin's aid in helping him build weapons that could put Earth's heroes on par with the Serpent and his Worthy. Odin agrees to allow Tony access to his great forge, but tells him that he only had a few more days before the full might of Asgard came down upon the Earth to wipe out the Serpent, oh, and that he didn't see Stark's side having any shot of winning, godly weapons or not... Ah that Odin, what a great guy! Anyway, the slightly drunk Tony heads into the forge and meets with Odin's chief weapon makers, a mess of foul-mouth dwarves. The dwarves aren't exactly happy that they have to stop what they were doing to help Tony create weapons, but Odin is the boss, so they halt their work to hear Tony out on his ideas. After Tony speaks to the dwarves, most of the dwarves go back to work, although a few are still VERY miffed that they were taking orders from a “pink elf”. After Tony drunkenly knocks down some metal, a dwarf punches him in the nose, at which point Tony reciprocates in kind. Having knocked the dwarf on his ass seems to have given Tony some respect amongst the dwarves, so they invite him into their rest area and offer him a drink, which he gladly accepts... As for the other main story, Pepper Potts decides to don her Rescue suit and head to Paris to see if there was anybody still alive for her to help. Meanwhile, the Hammer girls, who haven't gotten a response from Detroit Steel(because he was turned to stone!), decide to head to Paris to retrieve the Detroit Steel suit, and if possible, the pilot of the suit. To that end, the younger of the Hammers hops in a suit of armor, gathers a team, and off they go. Add the Grey Gargoyle, who's still lurking around the eerily quiet streets of Paris, and next issue should give us a three way throwdown between Rescue, the Hammer girl, and the Serpent possessed Gargoyle.

Thoughts: What can I say? This was a very good comic, that validated my faith in it. I mean it wasn't perfect or anything, but it tied into the Fear Itself events perfectly, which makes sense since Matt Fraction is writing both. Whereas most of the Fear Itself tie-ins are unnecessary to the main story, or unnecessary period, reading Iron Man greatly enhances the main FI mini, since events in Iron Man tend to bleed over into Fear Itself. I enjoyed both stories, although I am a bit annoyed that Tony threw away his years of sobriety just like that... I get that Fraction is trying to show that the whole Fear Itself thing is SO big that Tony is willing to do anything to end it, but we already knew it was big, what with Washington DC being destroyed and Paris being turned to stone and all... Tossing out Tony's years of sobriety just seem kind of unnecessary... At least that's how I see it.

Score: 9 out of 10.Well, when in Rome...


Ultimate Fallout #2(of 6?):

Summary: This issue begins where the last one left off, with Steve Rogers apologizing to Aunt May for his imagined role in the death of her nephew, Peter Parker(Spider-Man to you noobs you there). May reads Cap the riot act before slapping him in the face and yelling at all of the heroes present before running outside, where she collapses to her knees. J. Jonah Jameson(of all people) walks over and offers May a hand, helping her up and recommending she returns to the Cathedral, which she does. From there we head to Thor, who's in the Cathedral, thinking about how awesome Asgard was, and envisioning all of the recently deceased heroes hanging out in Valhalla. Meanwhile, Rogue is sadly wandering around the country, figuring that with all of the recent deaths, God would soon be taking everybody else as well. This issue ends with Many Jane writing an article detailing how “the world” killed Peter.

Thoughts: Eh. I liked the last issue and the singular focus it had on Peter's death more than this one. I mean I get that this mini-series is setting up the new Ultimate Spider-Man, Ultimates and Ultimate X-Men series's, but did we really need a bunch of pages featuring Thor thinking about Asgard? We know he's Asgardian, what did his thoughts really add to this story, or the new Ultimates series? Add the fact that we had Rogue(who along with Shadowcat are probably my most hated X-Men) in this one, and yeah, this issue definitely fell short of the high bar set by the last issue.

Score: 7 1/2 out of 10.Aw, get up ya drama queen!

Invincible Iron Man #505 & Alpha Flight #1

Two more Fear Itself related comics to go before I'm done with that x-over this week. I'll tell you right now, one of these comics was REALLY good, while the other was REALLY bad... just by looking at the titles, I'd bet you could figure out which is which!

Invincible Iron Man #505:

Summary: Upon waking up and realizing that he was lying on a pile of statues that used to be Parisians, Tony Stark vomits into his helmet before he is noticed by the Serpent possessed Grey Gargoyle. The Gargoyle flies over to attack, and swings his hammer at Iron Man, missing him, but shattering dozens of statues that were once people, much to Tony's horror. Tony blasts away at Gargoyle, but can't scratch his hide, while Gargoyle manages to connect with Tony, sending him sailing through the deserted streets of Paris, destroying statues as he went. Before the Gargoyle catches up to Tony, Detroit Steel arrives on the scene and blasts away at the Gargoyle. Tony, realizing that Steel had no shot against Gargoyle, tries to convince him to leave, but Steel simply figures Tony was being a gloryhound, and presses his attack. While Tony's systems try to re-power, Gargoyle takes Steel down and tears open the front of the armor, exposing the man inside. With the protection of the armor gone, Steel's pilot turns to stone, and before Tony can fly over to do anything, Gargoyle stomps on the statue, shattering the pilot of Steel. Tony places most of his energy into a sword-like laser beam and slices Gargoyle in the face, actually hurting the monster, but receives a massive shot to the chest with Gargoyle's hammer for his troubles, a shot that cracks the repulsor in Tony's chest. With Gargoyle temporarily injured, Tony realizes staying any longer to continue the battle was tantamount to suicide, and flies away from Paris as fast as he can. This issue ends with Tony heading back to Stark Reliant in Seattle, where he says his good-byes to Bethany Cabe and Pepper Potts, grabs some components to fix his damaged armor, and takes a bottle of champagne...

Thoughts: Matt Fraction continues to bring the awesome in this series. I've got to say, I might not have liked what went down in Fear Itself #3, but Fear Itself, Invincible Iron Man and Mighty Thor, all of which are written by Fraction have been amongst the best comics I've been reading the past few months. Much like Avengers Academy, this comic did a great job of showing a) just how insanely powerful the Serpent's henchmen were, and b) just how awful their actions were. This issue also did a great job of showing us how damaging psychologically the events in Paris were on Tony Stark himself. Seeing Tony take that bottle with him, showed us, probably more than anything else, that he wasn't expecting to make it through Fear Itself. Again, this was a great comic, that has me eagerly anticipating the next issue.

Score: 9 out of 10.That's all kinds of messed up!


Alpha Flight #1(of 8):

Summary: Attuma has launched an attack on Vancouver, and Alpha Flight heads over to face down the Serpent powered warlord. Alpha Flight manages to deal with Attuma's Atlantian henchmen, but can't bring down Attuma himself. Ultimately Guardian manages to push his suit to the limit and brings Attuma to an unoccupied plot of land on Canada's eastern coast, but winds up collapsing from the strain of it all. As for Attuma, he... well, I really don't know what happens to him, he kind of disappears... Some other boring things then happen, and this issue ends with Vindicator finding Guardian and inexplicably attacking him.

Thoughts: You know, I don't know why I bother buying any comic books with Greg Pak's name on the cover. Now in fairness, this comic was written by Pak and Fred Van Lente, but regardless of who wrote it, I hated it. The Alpha Flight characters were just flat out unlikable(what the HELL happened to Marrina?!?), the story did nothing for me, and this comic just didn't have that same feel of dread that the better written Fear Itself tie-ins had managed to cultivate... Kind of like Herc, which was written by, what a shock, Van Lente and Pak... Sorry, I gave this one a shot because it was a Fear Itself tie-in, but I won't be picking up the rest of this series...

Score: 4 out of 10.And from here, Attuma magically vanished.

Hawkeye: Blindspot #4 & Invincible Iron Man #504

Two Marvel comics on the agenda for today, one I've been looking forward to all month long(Hawkeye: Blindspot) and one I'm expecting big things from(Iron Man). Will they live up to my lofty expectations or will I wind up being disappointed??? Well, let's find out!

Hawkeye: Blindspot #4(of 4):

Summary: So after the events at the end of the last issue, Hawkeye is blind now. AND he's trapped in a room with his crazed brother Barney(who's going by the codename Trickshot) and Baron Zemo, the man who put all of Clint's recent misery into motion due to Clint taking away something Zemo loved(Moonstone). Clint let's his brother taunt him for a while while he tries to regain his bearings and remember where everybody was placed in the room. Having listened to Barney blather on for a while, and recalling the layout of the room, Clint fires a few trick arrows at his surprised brother, hoping to disorient him. Unfortunately, Barney recovers faster than Clint, and knocks Clint across the room, causing Clint to totally lose track of what was where. Now really blind, and practically helpless, Barney begins to nick Clint with several arrows, just to be an ass. Barney decides to beat Clint to death with his bare hands and begins to do just that, asking Clint if he had any last words, to which Clint responds, “Dad would be proud.” in reference to the abusive father both Clint and Barney had suffered beatings from as youths. That line completely infuriates Barney, allowing Clint to get the upper-hand by latching onto Barney's leg and delivering a beating of his own. Eventually Barney puts a bit of distance between the two and they both pull out their last remaining arrow... Clint throws his first, and a water filled arrow breaks under Barney's feet. Barney laughs that off and steps on the water preparing to throw his final arrow, a conventional and deadly one. Clint listens to Barney step in the pool of water and is able to anticipate the arrival of Barney's arrow by sound and catch it, which shocks Barney long enough for Clint to throw it back at him, pinning him to the wall by the shoulder, before he's able to knock out his pinned brother with a well placed right. With the battle between the brothers over, Baron Zemo emerges from the shadows and applauds the fight he just saw, telling Hawkeye that they were even now, since they had now both lost somebody they loved. Clint says nuts to that and tries to blindly attack Zemo by following his voice, but is in no real condition to defeat a fighter as skilled as Zemo, and is easily brushed aside. Zemo tells Clint that since he had won this round of their battle, he was releasing all of the money Barney had made back during his criminal days to Clint, making Clint a very wealthy man. Clint makes one last effort to get Zemo, but Zemo teleports away, just as Steve Rogers and Iron Man arrive on the scene to find Clint barely conscious. Later, in a lab at Avengers Tower, Clint wakes up and is surprised that he can sort of see again. Dr. Blake(Thor's civilian guise) informs Clint that his earlier usage of the Pym Particles to turn into Goliath had temporarily reduced the swelling in Clint's brain, making surgery a possibility. Blake tells Clint that they were going to use Barney's bone marrow(as per Barney's wishes) in an attempt to help Clint's own body regenerate the damage done to his occipital lobe, hopefully curing his blindness. A quick surgery later, and Clint wakes up able to see again. After thanking his friends who had stuck with him throughout this mini(Blake, Iron Man and Steve), Clint heads into Barney's room to find out why his brother had given his bone marrow to help Clint. Barney explains that HE wanted to kill Clint, and that he wanted to do it when Clint was at 100%, not as a blind man. Clint tells Barney that he refuses to give up hope that one day they'd be working together, but Barney is insistent that he WILL kill Clint eventually and that he'd never forgive him. A few days later, Clint heads back to the funhouse where the climatic final battle began, as well as the place Clint first became Hawkeye and Barney became Trickshot, and decides to use his new fortune to fix the place up and make it a place of redemption.

Thoughts: Well, I first want to say this... I LOVED this mini-series. The first three issues were absolutely phenomenal. This issue was really good too, but there were a few things that bugged me... Clint's battle with Barney(and to a lesser extent Zemo) just seemed too evenly matched... I mean Clint was fully blind during that fight, but was more than able to hold his own. Yes, eventually Barney did put Clint down, and Clint was able to outsmart his older brother by making him angry, and thus careless, but Clint catching the final arrow BLIND and firing it back at Barney, hitting him RIGHT in the shoulder and pinning him to the wall was a bit much for me. I can only suspend my belief so far! Other then that though, I have no real complaints here. Clint got his eyesight back(which is something that HAD to happen), he also got his brother back(somebody who can become a serious threat to Clint, and hopefully the Avengers), and still has heat with Baron Zemo. So yes, as one of the biggest Hawkeye fans you'll ever find, I'd call this mini-series a RESOUNDING success, and I'll tip my hat to Jim McCann(writer) and Paco Diaz(artist) for providing me with a Hawkeye mini-series that I'll remember for years to come.

Score: 8 1/2 out of 10.That's a great catch... For a blind man!!!


Invincible Iron Man #504: (Fear Itself tie-in)

Summary: We get started with th Grey Gargoyle watching one of the Serpent's hammers land in Paris. Curious, he approaches it and becomes one of the Serpent's Worthy. As for the star of this comic, Tony Stark tells Pepper Potts to hire Bethany Cabe(who has worn the War Machine armor a while back) as the head of security for Stark Resilient, especially since he'd be busy dealing with the Fear Itself stuff. Pepper doesn't really want to, since Tony had been romantically involved with Bethany(who hasn't Tony been romantically involved with?!), but Tony puts his foot down and rushes off to Paris to see what had happened there. Upon arriving, Tony's senses pick up NO life signs anywhere in the city. Tony lands and is horrified to find nothing but stone statues that used to be people. A man sneaks out of his home and tells Tony to get out of the city before it was too late, but alas, it IS too late and the now super-charged, Serpent possessed Grey Gargoyle(along with his big-ass sledgehammer) turns the man into stone before turning his attack to Iron Man. Tony rapidly realizes that the Gargoyle can't seem to turn Tony to stone, but is WAY stronger and faster then he's ever been before, knocking Tony through several buildings, as well as through several stone people, breaking them to Tony's horror. Tony tries to take the battle to Gargoyle, and is simply decimated by the Gargoyle. The Gargoyle beats Tony to the ground, and slams his sledgehammer into Tony's face, as Tony tries desperately to get a mayday out to the rest of the Avengers. After the sledgehammer shot, Tony is left a broken, battered, bloody and unconscious mess. Eventually Tony comes to and realizes he was buried under something very heavy. Tony climbs to the surface and is stunned when he realizes that he was buried under hundreds of broken statues of former people.

Thoughts: Wooooooo, now THIS was a GREAT comic! The ONLY knock I had against it was the stuff with Pepper and Bethany. Honestly, I could care less about whether Pepper was jealous of Tony's relationship with Bethany. Besides that though? I loved every page! Unsurprisingly Matt Fraction did a great job with this Fear Itself tie-in(I mean he should! He's the architect of the story!), and the sense of dread while Tony was in the silent City of Lights was palpable. The Grey Gargoyle(who I've always seen as a joke of a character) came across looking like a MONSTER, and completely squashed Iron Man in a matter of a few pages, something you don't see happen very often. To say I'm looking forward to the next issue of this series is a HUGE understatement!

Score: 9 1/2 out of 10.Nighty night, Tony.

Thunderbolts #156 & Invincible Iron Man #503

Two more Marvel reviews, including the(supposed) Iron Man/Fear Itself tie-in. All I'm gonna say is that that issue of IM was about as loosely tied in to Fear Itself as humanly possible...

Invincible Iron Man #503(Fear Itself tie-in):

Summary: Last issue Dr. Octopus activated the nuclear bomb he had acquired with the intention of destroying Manhattan. Tony Stark tries to defuse the bomb, but is continuously harassed/attacked by Octopus. Tony manages to break away from Octopus and starts working on the bomb again, when it suddenly loses two minutes, going from 4 minutes to detonation to 2 minutes in the span of a single second. Realizing he had no chance to defuse the bomb now, Tony decides to plead with Octopus to shut down the bomb. Octopus forces Tony to literally beg on his hands and knees, while demanding Tony only refers to him as “Master”. With no recourse, Tony does as he's told, but Octopus, being an absolute jerk, doesn't feel Tony is being sincere, so he drops the countdown to 30 seconds. Now totally panicked, Tony begs in earnest, kissing one of his tentacles and telling Octopus that he was smarter then Tony in every way. Having gotten what he wanted, Octopus shuts down the counter and disarms the bomb. Octopus reveals that the bomb was never wired to explode, and that he never actually called it a “bomb” just a device. Tony calls Octopus on that, since Octopus had repeatedly called the device a bomb, and Octopus just shrugs and says that he lied to get what he wanted, before leaving... HA! From there, Pepper Potts saves two of Tony's scientists from Sandman and Electro(although they get away) and a few of the events from Fear Itself #1 are replayed here.

Thoughts: Eh. I really enjoyed the first few parts of this storyline, but this one left me a bit apathetic. I liked what Octopus did to Tony, as it was a real jerk move, but Tony seemed to give in just a bit too easy to Octopus for my taste. The stuff with Pepper and Octopus's goons didn't thrill me, and the Fear Itself stuff wasn't anything new, simply a repeat of those items falling from the sky. So while the stuff with Tony and Octopus was good, the rest of this comic was kind of flat for me.

Score: 6 out of 10.Huh, maybe I should have put this on the kissing blog...


Thunderbolts #156:

Summary: Luke Cage and the Thunderbolts find out that Warden Walker(the former US Agent) had been instructed by the government(?) to begin assembling a Thunderbolts Beta team to be headed by Songbird. Cage doesn't like this, but before he can really raise any hell over it, he's called away on a mission to a magical castle in Germany. Now that Satana was a member of the T-Bolts, the government wanted Cage and the T-Bolts to deal with some mystical troubles, thus explaining the mission and its timing. Luke and th T-Bolts head off to Germany and enter the magical castle, only to be assaulted by several powerful WWI era poltergeists. The T-Bolts find themselves being decimated by the spirits, and Luke asks Satana to do something to help, to which she responds with a quiet laugh. Back at the T-Bolts prison, Songbird, Mack V, Fixer and Walker are interviewing potential Beta T-Bolt recruits, which goes well until Songbird gives Dr. Zabo his formula, turning him into Mr. Hyde. The hope was that Hyde would serve as the muscle for the Beta Bolts, but it seems he'd rather tear Songbird in half!

Thoughts: I had absolutely NO problems with this issue. The duel storylines were good, the two cliffhangers have me looking forward to the next issue, as do the two possible betrayals that are staring Cage and Songbird in the face. Will Satana turn on Cage and the T-Bolts on her very FIRST mission(I hope not!), will Hyde try to kill Songbird and lose his shot at becoming a Beta Bolt(I don't care much about Hyde one way or the other...)? Good stories and strong cliffhangers are a good way to have me eagerly anticipating the next issue!

Score: 8 out of 10.A little bit of Satana makes my life a happier place.

Quick Hits: 3/22/11

Hey there X-Maniacs, another day, another three Marvel reviews. We have one good comic in this post, and two... well, not so good comics. But thems the breaks sometimes. It can't be all flowers and sunshine everyday. I received 5 subscription books in the mail today, so I really have to get a move on with these reviews... Okay, preamble over, let's get to the reviews.

Invincible Iron Man #502:

Summary: We kick off with Tony Stark still trying to figure out a way to save Dr. Octopus from death. You see, Octopus tasked Tony with helping to save his life or Octopus would set of a thermo-nuclear bomb in New York. Basically Octopus felt his case was hopeless and wanted to see Tony admit defeat before he died. While that scene is playing out, Pepper Potts is confronted by Electro and Sandman at the home of one of Tony's employees. Pepper nearly takes the two Secret Sixers out, but is halted when Electro threatens to electrocute the employee. Another Stark employee happens across the scene and tries to help, but only manages to get Electro angry enough to send a pulse of electricity tearing through the building. Back with Tony, after some thought he figures the best way to help Octopus was for him to head to real doctors like Mr. Fantastic, Hank Pym or Dr. Strange. This pisses Octopus off since he told Tony to figure out a way to help him, and he wanted Tony to admit that he couldn't accomplish that feat. Eventually Tony DOES admit that he can't help, which doesn't bring Octopus the pleasure he hoped it would. The two fight for a bit and Octopus tosses Tony into the bombs, setting off the timer and ending this issue.

Thoughts: This was a very good little comic. I've never been much of a Dr. Octopus fan(he's a short, fat guy with a bad haircut! What's to like?), but Matt Fraction has actually made Octopus interesting here. Basically all Octopus wants is to humble the ultra-arrogant Tony Stark before he dies due to some perceived slight from Tony years ago. Tony DOES come up with a logical solution(go see a REAL doctor), but Octopus refuses to take that advice since he wants to see Tony admit that he can't do something. So it looks like Octopus wants to see Tony humbled more than he wants to live... That would make more sense if it were Spider-Man in Tony's place, but it still makes for a good read. I guess that's probably my one real complaint with this storyline. It would make SO much more sense if this was playing out in an issue of Amazing Spider-Man instead of Iron Man...

Score: 8 1/2 out of 10.No, he can't stop talking...


Captain America and Crossbones #1:

Summary: We start this one with Crossbones being visited by some mysterious government official in his prison cell. The official wants Crossbones to use his “unique abilities”(or in layman's terms, his killing skills) on some secret mission. Not really having anything to lose, Crossbones decides what the hell and goes with the official. Crossbones gets loaded onto an airplane and dropped onto an island somewhere in Eastern Europe, where he finds his equipment(lots of guns) and the dossier for his mission, which tells him he is to locate and extract a boy. After some wandering, Crossbones discovers a mess of half-eaten corpses all over the town, and discovers that the few remaining villagers were holed up at an abandoned nuclear power plant. Crossbones convinces the villagers that he was an Avenger sent to help, and learns that the town was under siege by werewolf creatures. He also learns that anybody bitten or scratched by the werewolves suffer a horrible death or becomes a werewolf creatures themselves, with the notable exception of the boy, who has proven immune to the werewolves scratches. Crossbones winds up betraying the villagers in the plant, and leaves them to be attacked by the werewolves, taking the boy outside during the confusion and getting picked up by a helicopter containing the official from earlier. We learn that it was the government official who introduced the werewolf plague to the town, to see what the success rate was. Needless to say, the official wanted to study the boy upon learning he was immune to the werewolves. Realizing that the official and his scientists would basically be dissecting the boy to learn why he was immune, and seeing some of himself in the boy, Crossbones throws the boy out of the helicopter to his death, figuring the boy deserved a quick death as opposed to a slow, agonizing one. And that basically ends this issue.

Thoughts: This comic book was interesting... On one hand, I enjoyed the Resident Evil-esque story, while on the other hand, I HATE when Crossbones is shown in a sympathetic/heroic light. That's why I was so annoyed that he was a member of the Thunderbolts. Usually a place on the T-Bolts is reserved for villains who have a chance of reforming, and Crossbones has none. He's an unrepentant Neo-Nazi who idolizes the Red Skull. Throughout this issue we were shown a few flashbacks from Crossbones life, which almost showed him in a sympathetic light, especially the flashback from when he was a boy. The fact that he killed the boy towards the end of this issue instead of handing him over to the government official, could also be looked at as the right thing to have done(in a warped sort of way). Like I said, the story WAS enjoyable, but Crossbones is kind of like the Red Skull to me. There's no way I'll ever see Crossbones in a sympathetic light, and when I read a comic like this, I do get a bit annoyed.

Score: 6 out of 10.Crossbones: Nazi and savior of abused children the world over...


Uncanny X-Force #5.1:

Summary: X-Force heads to Australia after being warned by Gateway that Lady Deathstrike and the Reavers were plotting against the mutants on Crazy Mutie Island(Utopia). This leads to a big battle between X-Force and the Reavers(with the main event being Wolverine vs Lady Deathstroke). X-Force manages to take out most of the Reavers with the exception of two, who manage to teleport to Crazy Mutie Island. Psylocke follows, and is very careful to avoid being seen by anybody since nobody on Crazy Mutie Island was supposed to know about the existence of X-Force. Lord Summers learns that the two Reavers had snuck onto the island and takes Magneto to hunt them down. As for the Reavers, they're trying to find the generators powering Crazy Mutie Island to detonate near them, hoping to sink the island. Psylocke manages to hunt down the two Reavers and kill them before they're able to blow themselves up, all while staying hidden from Lord Summers. Back in Australia, Wolvie gets the upper hand on Deathstrike, which leads to her switching her mind out of her body, but not before promising Wolvie that he hadn't seen the last of her.

Thoughts: Ugh. I did not like this comic at all. First off, I've never been a fan of Deathstrike or the Reavers, so that immediately put me off of this comic. Add Gateway(another character I'm not a fan of) and Psylocke running around slaughtering people, and yeah, that's a recipe for a bad comic in my eyes. Will some people enjoy this one? Sure, fans of the Reavers, Deathstrike and Psylocke will enjoy this comic. But me? I'll pass.

Score: 4 out of 10.There they go again...

Quick Hits: 2/26/11

Howdy, it's a tired and snow-weary X again(who else would it be?), ready to bring the awesome with a new Quick Hits review. As I type this up I just came in from shoveling snow all day(I typed this up on Friday and proofed it today), so if it makes less sense than usual, blame my worn out body and mind. Okay, with the excuses out of the way, let it be known that 3 Marvels and 1 DC make up this post, so without any further adieu, let's get to it!

X-Men #8:

Summary: Picking up from last issue, Spidey convinces the WORST ASSORTMENT OF X-MEN EVER to stop hunting the giant lizards in the NYC sewer system since Spidey believed they had been unwittingly turned into lizard-like creatures by the insane Lizard... Hmm, you know, calling Emma Frost, Wolvie, Storm and Gambit the WORST grouping of X-Men ever probably isn't very fair of me... I'd say the worst possible grouping of X-Men would look something like this: Emma Frost, Shadowcat, Maggot, and Colossus. Anyway the X-Men and Spidey head to a hotel room and share notes, learning that the lizard creatures had been kidnapping a bunch of nerdy teenagers. They manage to discover that all of the kids who had been abducted by the lizard creatures visited the same website(X-Man Comic Blog)and that soon thereafter were abducted. Now with a lead, the heroes begin to dig deeper into this mystery website. We end this issue learning that it wasn't Lizard himself who was transforming the children, but somebody who had captured Lizard and was using the children as experiments.

Thoughts: Okay. The only way this story can possibly be saved at this point is if the mystery villain is Dark Beast. I half suspect that it is him from the tiny glimpse of the villain we saw, but not really enough to say with any degree of definitiveness. Unfortunately, the story itself is doing absolutely nothing for me. With the exception of Wolvie(and I guess Storm), I could care less about the X-characters in this issue, Spidey really hasn't lent much to the story, and the kids who were captured, especially the one we met this issue REALLY didn't come across as very sympathetic. Hell, I was GLAD when the kid in this issue was abducted! By this point in this series I'm really hoping Victor Gishler revisits the vampire stuff again... SOON!

Score: 5 1/2 out of 10.Please be Dark Beast... Please be Dark Beast... Please be Dark Beast...


Detective Comics #874:

Summary: We kick things off with Commissioner Gordon meeting up with his son(I honestly didn't know he had a son!) at a coffee shop. James Jr. talks with Gordon for a while, apologizing for his past misbehavior and swearing that while he did a lot of bad things, he never killed anybody, as Babs and Dick had always suspected. James Jr. reveals that he had been diagnosed as a psychopath, and was taking experimental medicine to help him. Gordon doesn't know what to think and James Jr. leaves, telling his father that hopefully Gordon could find it in his heart to forgive him. From there we head to Batman(Dick Grayson) and Red Robin staking out a ship. It seems that the guys on the ship had stolen a rare bird from an aviary in Gotham(an aviary that James Jr. had coincidentally visited recently as well...), and the two former Robins climb board and attack. Unfortunately for Dick, he is still reeling from the drugging he suffered at the hands of the Dealer and is WAY off his game, getting knocked into the drink and swearing that a giant whale was in there with him wanting to eat him. Red Robin manages to take care of all the goons and pulls Dick out of the water, asking what happened. Dick almost admits that he was seeing things, but ultimately withholds that information. From there the two heroes had into the ship's underbelly and find dozens of stolen exotic animals, while this issue ends with Gordon staring at a bunch of unsolved case files involving murdered children.

Thoughts: I actually loved this comic. Oddly enough though, it's hard to verbalize why... I mean there was nothing special about this comic, but it really satisfied me while I was reading it. The scene with Gordon and his son was really well done, with James Jr. coming across as both remorseful and creepy at the same time, a REAL hard thing to pull off. Besides that we had Dick pushing himself too hard and almost paying the price for it. It was great to see Red Robin in this issue, and I was happy to see Tim save Dick, as opposed to the other way around(how things usually go). So far I may have to say that Scott Snyder's run on Detective is the best of the five main Bat-books right now(Batman Inc, Dark Knight, Batman and Robin and Batman).

Score: 8 1/2 out of 10.Dick Grayson and Tim Drake teaming up? Yes please.


Deadpool #33:

Summary: Our favorite red clad mercenary finds himself stuck out in space after his space car ran out of gas. Pool sends out a distress call and is picked up by a tow truck. The tow truck owner was expecting to find the space car's former owner inside, Macho Gomez, but Pool smugly gloats about having killed Macho last issue. Macho's wife comes after Pool, and the two wind up falling in love and getting married... Huh. Since Macho's wife was a part owner of the tow truck/repo company, Pool is given a job, and goes about botching everything he's asked to do. Finally the company's owner and the tow truck driver(who held a flame for Pool's new wife) decide to send Pool on a suicide mission, telling him he had to go out, hunt down and kill the inane living moon, Id. The idea of killing a planet(Pool refuses to call it a moon) excites Pool and he prepares to embark, not realizing he had no chance of succeeding.

Thoughts: I enjoyed this one. It wasn't spectacular, and the story was kind of dumb, but dumb works REALLY well in a DP comic, so in this case, dumb is good! From Pool marrying Macho's wife, to the company's owner plotting against him, to Pool's excitement over what was an obvious suicide mission, this comic was a fun read, and that's all I really ask for from a Deadpool comic.

Score: 8 out of 10.Disturbing...


Invincible Iron Man #501:

Summary: We begin with a flashback of a younger Tony Stark meeting Dr. Otto Octavius(the future Dr. Octopus) at a science expo. Tony is a self-absorbed little twerp, while Otto is always trying to gain the attention and respect of anybody who could help him continue his research. Needless to say they didn't get along, and as a matter of fact, a drunken Tony ends up taking a run at Otto... HA! In the present, we get a glimpse into Tony's day, as he meets with one of his workers about the designs for the New Asgard, does a TV interview about his new company and repulsor powered car, and attends a fashion show, mainly to ogle the models. At the end of the day, Tony is relaxing in his hotel room, watching his interview from earlier when a missile crashes into his room, destroying it. Luckily for Tony, he saw what was happening and had grown his Iron Man suit on and confronted the machine that fired the missile. Stark is surprised(and annoyed) to see Dr. Octopus's face on the video screen of the machine. Tony threatens Octopus until Octopus reveals that he had gotten his hands on a thermonuclear bomb, and was planning on setting it off in Manhattan unless Tony met with him on Octopus's space station. Not wanting to push the maniac's buttons, Tony flies to the station and meets Octopus face to face. Octopus explains that he was dying from a combination of brain and nerve damage. Knowing that Stark once managed to revive himself from a vegetative state, Octopus basically wants Tony to fix him, or admit that the great Tony Stark couldn't fix Octopus's problems. Tony is struck silent for a moment before telling Octopus that he couldn't fix him. Octopus wants Tony to try, since if Tony succeeds, Octopus has a new lease on life, while Tony failing would prove to Octopus, and the egotistical Tony that he wasn't as great as he always made himself out to be. Tony still doesn't want to help, so Octopus explains that besides the bomb he hid in New York, he had also kidnapped one of the scientists at Tony's company, and that Sandman and Electro were under orders to kill the scientist if they didn't hear from Octopus every five minutes. Octopus gloats a bit about how Tony was doomed to fail, since there was no conceivable way to help Octopus, while Tony calls Octopus pathetic, and the type of villain who was so insignificant that he never even bothered to worry about him. In the end, Tony looks at several brain scans of Octopus and decides that he'll at least attempt to save Octopus's life.

Thoughts: Trust me, this comic was way better then this review might have made it seem. This was my last review of the day, and as I stated in the open, I'm not exactly firing on all cylinders. With that said, I LOVED this comic! It was basically just two characters talking in the past and present, but Matt Fraction did it so well I was engrossed by each page. From Octopus wanting to see Tony fail at saving him, just to see the arrogant Tony humbled, to Tony's awesome digs about how little he thought of Octopus the scientist as well as Octopus the villain, this comic was a blast to read. Fraction has a few different ways he can go with this story too, which makes the rest of the storyline intriguing. Tony can succeed in spite of all of Octopus's taunts, thus saving the life of a notorious villain, or he can fail, something he doesn't do too well with. It's a comic like this that makes me glad I started reading Iron Man again.

Score: 9 out of 10.Tony Stark coming out and saying that he wasn't sorry Dr. Octopus was dying was awesome!

Quick Hits: Marvel Edition.

Well, I did three DC reviews yesterday, so it's only fair to tackle three Marvel comics today, right? The DC books set the bar pretty low, with the high score being an 8 and the low score being a 2. Can these Marvel books top that? Man, I'd sure hope so, for my sake!

Amazing Spider-Man #653:

Summary: Under siege from Alistair Smythe, John Jameson manages to avoid being blown up in his spacecraft thanks to a surprise(and secret)assist from Dr. Octopus. With John safe, Spider-Man falls from the craft, where he is attacked by a free-falling Scorpion. The New Avengers arrive on the scene and get rid of Scorpion, while mopping up some of the forces Smythe had sent to terrorize J. Jonah Jameson. Spidey, Mockingbird and Thing rush out to protect Jameson's wife(as well as Aunt May), while a few other New Avengers save Robbie Robertson. While battling Smythe's forces, Spidey realizes that the villains were using a spider-sense, so he heads to his storage facility(as Peter Parker)to find a device that would block the villain's spider-senses. As he emerges from storage, his fellow scientist confronts him, wanting to ask Peter a few questions about his relationship with Spidey.

Thoughts: Before I say anything else, allow me to state this... My GOD is that New Avengers line-up atrocious!!! What the HELL was Bendis thinking when he put that team together! Sorry, but the Heroes for Hire do NOT make a good team of Avengers! I mean that team is NEARLY as bad as James Robinson's JLA line-up, and he has a talking gorilla on his team!!! Awful... However, this issue WASN'T awful. It was good. Not great or anything, but it was good, clean, Spidey-rific fun. You had Spidey battling Scorpion, Spidey fighting some Spider-Slayers, and Peter Parker being confronted about his relationship to Spider-Man. What more could you ask for? Sure, the Dr. Octopus scene was kind of weird, but that seems to be setting up for future storylines, so I'll overlook it for now. I will say that being forced to see Squirrel Girl did deduct 1/2 from the final score... Sorry, but I HATE that thing!

Score: 7 1/2 out of 10.Worst Avengers Team EVER!!!!!


Invincible Iron Man #500.1:

Summary: This is an easy one to summarize! Basically Tony Stark heads to an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting and tells his life story... Kind of. He does make sure not to reveal his secret identity or anything like that(you still see what Tony is talking about during the flashback sequences). He tries to get Pepper Potts to go out with him(which is when he learns that he had slept with Pepper a while back)and after a rebuke, Tony goes out with a woman from the AA meeting. And that's pretty much that.

Thoughts: I thought this was a really good way of doing a Tony Stark origin story. It wasn't one of those tried and true comic book gimmicks where the hero sits down and tells his story to a fellow hero, somebody reads it off of a computer or something along those lines, it was Tony cryptically telling his own story to a roomful of strangers. Besides enjoying the way this comic was laid out, I liked the way Matt Fraction showed that while Tony has been sober for a while now, he does still have to battle the demon in the bottle. The thought that Tony regularly attends AA meetings really helped to humanize Tony a bit more for me, so kudos for that.

Score: 8 1/2 out of 10.You see that? Being a billionaire super-hero isn't all flowers and sunshine!


Deadpool/Cable #26:

Summary: With Cable dead, Deadpool decides to head to the country Cable ran, Rumekistan(you all remember Rumekistan from Cable/Deadpool, right?), to throw a party for his fallen friend. Unfortunately for DP, when he goes to talk to the president of the country, the president explains that he had NO idea who this Cable character was, and then has DP tossed in jail fearing he was an insurgent. DP naturally escapes, gets drunk and then gets captured by the president's forces. The president demands to know why DP was in Rumekistan, and after hearing DP's story, the president explains that he was in the wrong country, as Rumekistan had suffered a civil war and split up. DP decides to help the president with his terrorist problems(since that's what Cable would have done), and DP swiftly defeats the terrorist forces. Before leaving, DP makes sure the people of New Rumekistan thought Cable had saved them, and the people throw a party in Cable's honor.

Thoughts: Hey, for a comic I expected nothing from, and wasn't even going to pick up, this was seriously great! You had plenty of humorous moments(which every Deadpool comic needs), a good, believable and funny story(only DP would wander into the WRONG Rumekistan!), and did a great job showing that DP does indeed have a sensitive side. The flashback sequences fit into the story perfectly and didn't seem out of place, and the final scene was very well done. I really have no complaints here at all. For a little throwaway story, Duane Swierczynski did a wonderful job.

Score: 9 out of 10.I love how sneaky Pool looks standing behind Cap here.

Invincible Iron Man #500

Review: This story jumps back and forth between today and 2052, so this review is going to be tough to type, and even tougher to follow... We begin with Tony Stark sitting next to Peter Parker on the subway. Peter is angry at Tony because Tony “fired and humiliated” him(wait, when?!), but Tony tells Peter that he had been working on something extremely dangerous before he erased his mind, and can't quite remember what it was. Peter wants to know what any of this had to do with him, and Tony reveals that Peter had been working with him on this project. Peter decides to put aside his problems with Tony and the two head back to Tony's hotel room to try to figure out what Tony was working on and if it had gotten out. After some thinking, they realize that Tony had been aimlessly thinking about the most destructive weapon he could have possibly designed when he was bored one day, which takes care of the first part of the problem, figuring out what Tony was forgetting. After a quick search of the Net, Peter and Tony realize that some group of idiot teenagers calling themselves “The Bastard Son's of Wilbur Day” had been blogging about some super-weapon they were creating to destroy all technology and return the world to the Iron Age. Oh, and for the record, Wilbur Day was deceased c-list villian Stilt-Man, and according to Spider-Man, he had no children and didn't hate technology! Tony leaves to hunt down these kids, and Peter switches into his Spidey gear to assist. The two heroes find the headquarters of the Bastards, and are attacked by a giant, partially built machine. The machine destroys much of the building, but since it wasn't completed(and was put together by morons)is defeated by Tony and Spidey. However, this battle shows Tony that his errant thoughts had built that monstrosity, and that with plans for it on the Net, there was no way to stop others from using it. Tony returns to his hotel and finds Peter still there(he had arrived moments before and changed back from Spidey), and tells Peter his dilemma. Peter admits that there's nothing Tony can do to kill the info already out there, but says that Tony could put a backdoor into the plans to allow Tony to shutdown or kill the killer machines. Tony decides to do just that, and as per Peter's recommendation, Tony puts a Spider-shaped electro-magnetic pulse hidden in the machines to kill them if need be. Now there was also a futuristic portion of this story which showed what would have happened if Tony's machines had fallen into the wrong hands, in this case, the Mandarin, who was using an enslaved and broken Tony Stark to keep him alive. Mandarin was using ten killer machines to destroy the Earth for some unseen masters, but thanks to a joint effort of Tony's son(who simple math tells me would be born this year, in 2011!)and his younger daughter. Tony's son dies sabotaging some of Mandarin's forces, and this snaps Tony back to reality, which leads to him finally killing Mandarin, and destroying all of the killer machines with a massive E-M pulse. This E-M pulse destroys all tech on the Earth, including Tony's life support system, killing him... D'oh! That dismal future ends with Tony's daughter and the surviving humans trying to rebuild in a tech-free world.

Thoughts: I am now, and always have been a sucker for alternate reality/futeristic storylines, so I definitely enjoyed this comic. I also liked the fact that this was a one and done sort of story. I was expecting a regular size comic story, followed with 2 or 3 reprinted stories. Instead, this story took up the entire comic, which was a welcome change for an anniversary comic. The story was good, but I had too many questions after reading it to call it great, and that's probably more on me than Matt Fraction. I didn't know that Tony no longer knew Peter was Spider-Man, and I had no idea what they were talking about when Peter said Tony fired and humiliated him. But that's probably because I just started reading Iron Man comics again recently after dropping them after the Civil War story. For somebody more well versed in recent IM history than me though? I think they'd LOVE this issue.

Score: 8 1/2 out of 10.It's like 'Waiting for Godot' for the 21st century!