Friday, July 9, 2010

Avengers #2

Avengers #2: Writer: BENDIS! Pencils: John Romita Jr.

Review: This comic gets started with the Avengers searching out Noh-Varr, the former Marvel Boy and current Protector, hoping that he'd be able to use his advanced Kree technology to help them see into the future to ascertain if Kang was telling them the truth last issue. Noh-Varr agrees to help, and after a while he creates a device that can look into all possible futures. The Avengers watch the many images, and spot the one they were looking for, the future Kang warned them about where their children ended up murdering Kang's future self, Immortus. After the team watches Immortus die, the timestream begins to break apart, and Noh-Varr's machine ends up being destroyed. The fact that the timestream seemed “broken” severely concerns Iron Man, who explains to the team that if time was damaged, not only would the future be affected, but the past and present would as well. Before Noh-Varr can construct something to allow the team to enter the timestream to repair it, they are attacked by Wonder Man(!?!). Wonder Man shouts that the Avengers shouldn't have reassembled, and that the Avengers would only wind up causing more trouble then they stopped. Wonder Man beats the team up for a bit until Noh-Varr blasts him with some sort of Kree weaponry, which causes Wonder Man to retreat, but not before he threatens the team one final time. Still reeling from Wonder Man's betrayal, an alternative version of Apocalypse and his Four Horsemen(!!!)appear thanks to the fractured timestream, ending this issue.

What I Thought: Wow, this comic was Fan-freaking-tastic! This storyline is TOP-NOTCH, and the return of Noh-Varr, a favorite character of mine, was like the icing on the cake. So it's all good then? Not so fast my friends! I'd have EASILY given this comic a 10 out of 10, but Bendis's(that's right, I am officially UN-capitalizing his name, he's earned my respect again!!!)horrid dialogue really hurt my enjoyment of this comic. There were just pages and pages of unnecessary dialogue here... Where a simple yes or no answer would have sufficed, Bendis would fill scenes with TONS of unneeded wordage. For example, in one scene, Maria Hill was talking to Bucky about Kang. She asks Bucky if he knew who Kang was, and Bucky says no. Now a normal writer would have probably done something like this, Maria: “Have you read the intel reports on Kang yet?” Bucky: “No.” Maria: Explains who Kang is and what he's done to the Avengers in the past. Simple and concise. Instead Maria rambles about how she thinks Kang is setting a trap for the team, how Kang is crazy, and then they suddenly start to talk about how Tony Stark loves to make plans... I mean really!? Imagine being the significant other of Bendis and asking him what he wanted for dinner!?! Bendis: “I-I think I'd like one of those things... The thing with the skin on it. What's it called... The thing with the-the skin. Um... Not one of those little fishy guys, the skin thing... You know the thing! It-it has two legs and wings! I think-I think it's called a chickie? No wait! A-A chicken!!! That's what I want to have for dinner! A chicken... Or-or maybe one of those other things...” Okay, that went on for WAY too long, but I think I made my point! Just say you want the DAMN chicken!!! Not EVERY conversation needs to be an epic. If Bendis could only reel in his inane babble, I think this storyline might actually go down as one of my favorite Avengers stories in a LONG time...

Score: 9 out of 10. Like I said, if not for the dialogue, this comic was an easy 10 out of 10...Blah blah blah...


  1. Thanks for reviewing this X-Man! I'm glad Bendis is winning you back, but I'm not totally sold on this plot yet.

    I bought the first issue of this, and based on reading that and the info in this post I'm guessing Wonder Man is not himself. He's like an alternate version from the future or possessed by someone. He seems a far cry from the idiot we saw in Mighty Avengers.

    I liked your Bendis Dinner scenario. I'd be interested to know how other creators order food.

  2. No problem at all Kello! Since I enjoyed this comic, I was more then happy to review it!

    I'm in COMPLETE agreement with you regarding Wonder Man, Kello... His powers were a bit off in this comic(I think he managed to teleport away from the battle), and he just kept repeating, "I warned you" or something along those lines. Crazy alternate Wonder Man from the future makes perfect sense.

    "I'd be interested to know how other creators order food." HA!! As would I! Let's see, Geoff Johns would probably order some retro food from the 1950's, Ed Brubaker would order something awesome(you know, because HE'S awesome!)and Grant Morrison would probably try to order something in Morrison-ese, so he'd probably starve since nobody would be able to figure out what he was talking about! :D

  3. Ha!Grant Morrison would order all the ingredients, and you wouldn't know why the heck he was asking for them until the very end of dinner.

    Ed Brubaker would order Black coffee, a huge bloody rare T-Bone steak,and a pack of smokes.

    Geoff Johns would order scrambled eggs and then try to put them back in their shells.

  4. HA!!! The Geoff Johns one had me rolling Kello! I can almost see Geoff looking at the scrambled eggs and thinking to himself, "These eggs were better off before they came out of their shells!!!"

    "Grant Morrison would order all the ingredients, and you wouldn't know why the heck he was asking for them until the very end of dinner." There's a good chance you wouldn't know why he was asking for those ingredients AFTER dinner either! :D

  5. Yeah, you'll have to go back and research a meal Bob Kane once had in 1943, and Grant Morrison's ingredients will totally make sense.

  6. HA!!! Thanks Kello, you just made my night!

  7. Haha, you guys are hilarious. I wonder what Ed Brubaker would do in this dinner scenario? Probably serve you a delicious chicken dinner and then, when you were done, he'd reveal the chicken was never really dead. :\

  8. HA! Now THAT would be an impressive feat! "Remember that chicken dinner you just ate X? Well, not only WASN'T the chicken dead, it's standing right behind you with a gun!!!"

  9. Just as an aside, who's the guy to the left of Stark?
    Spider-Man, Wolverine, Thor, ?, Stark, Hawkeye, Captain America, Spider-Woman, Noh-Varr.
    Oh, and seriously, again Bendis? One woman on the team? I mean, that's pretty bad...

    And we all know what Dan Dido would order for dinner. A chicken carcass, skinned, blood torn all over the plate, dripping as it's walked from the kitchen to the table.

    And Joe Quaseda (?), well, his would just be a contract giving away your marriage for a chicken...

  10. That's actually not a guy at all Nagash, that's Maria Hill. Who's kind of/sort of on the team I guess...

    Ha, nah I say Didio would just wait to see what Geoff Johns ordered and then eat that!

  11. :O wow, she's changed since Dark Avengers. What happened to her hair for one?

    Well, Geoff or Grant ;) and then make it more gory ;)

  12. I think you may be mixing up Maria Hill with Victoria Hand(?). Hill was the head of SHIELD under Stark, while Hand was heading up HAMMER with Osborn. I hope I'm not mixing up the names and thereby confusing both you AND me! I think Hill always had shortish hair... If I'm thinking of the right character that is!

    HA, good point! Johns isn't the only one who can do whatever he wants, Morrison also seems to have carte blanche with Batman nowadays.

  13. I may well be. You know I don't have that much Marvel knowledge, so I'm bound to make some mistakes. Plus, also, is Bendis really doing that well for you? Cause I gotta say, it doesn't look that promising. I mean, I know I haven't had a chance to look at issue 2 yet (not getting to the shop till Friday), but issue 1 wasn't that good when I skimmed it...

  14. I gotta say, compared to the way Bendis was writing a few months ago, his current work is WAY better now imo. Sure, his dialogue still sucks the big one, but storywise, he's doing a really good job. Then again, it could just be the fact that I'm SO happy to see the CLASSIC Avengers back together that I'm willing to overlook some things! :P