Sunday, October 24, 2010

Brightest Day #12

Hey, it's my 400th post of the year! And what better way to celebrate that momentous milestone than with a review of one of the worst mini-series to come out of DC in years, Brightest Day!? Enjoy... If you dare!!! MWA-HAHAHAHA!!!

Overall: This issue was very Martian Manhunter heavy, with a touch of Firestorm thrown in. I'll start with the Firestorm story first, since it was quicker. The Firestorms decide to chase after Deathstorm and his newly recreated Black Lantern Corp, which is fine by Deathstorm since he holds a major numbers advantage. Before we get any kind of action, the voice in Deathstorm's head(Nekron? Anti-Monitor? Deadpool? Pikachu?)tells him to ignore the Firestorms and to get the White Lantern(whoever or whatever that is)instead. As for the Martian Manhunter, he heads to Mars where he is forced to battle that evil female Martian(whose name is D'Kay D'Razz in case you care). D'Kay wants to restart the Martian race with J'onn, but J'onn refuses to have sexual relations with that woman, Miss D'Razz(heh heh), because she's evil and I don't know, ugly I guess. Anyway, the two Martians battle, with D'Kay taking the battle to J'onn's mind, where he is forced to confront the JLA. J'onn shakes D'Kay's influence and beats her into the ground, until all of the dead Martians on Mars come back to life(huh?). J'onn is reunited with his family and it feels so good, but alas, it's a mental trick D'Kay was playing on J'onn, and this issue concludes with J'onn embracing D'Kay, who he believes to be his wife.

This was a weird comic for me. There were parts that were just horrid, like D'Kay's lame origin(she made herself forget she was ever a Martian, but remembered she was a Martian when J'onn came back? Zuh??), but there were other parts that were... I wouldn't say good, so I'll say less horrid. The actual fight between J'onn and D'Kay was alright, and the Firestorm stuff was okay I guess(even though I'm SO sick of their dumb “Odd Couple” dynamic already), but as usual, this comic disappointed me. The end was especially pathetic, considering J'onn had been honing his telepathy for YEARS, while D'Kay had locked her telepathy away while she lived like a human. I'm supposed to believe that D'Kay, who'd have to be considered a lapsed telepath at best, was powerful to defeat J'onn, who's shown he's one of the most powerful telepaths in the DCU? No way! How much longer is this mini going to go on??

Score: 3 1/2 out of 10.Hmm, who knew J'onn was so stupid...

24 comments:

  1. Lol, I love how he knows the first one is a trick but the second and more outrageous one is suddenly worth believing. What a big green idiot, he makes the Hulk look like Reed Richards.

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  2. HA!!! That is SO true! The first one actually made sense, and yet J'onn saw right through it, while the second mind game, which sees J'onn resurrect the ENTIRE population of Mars by repeatedly punching the ground, actually tricks him?! Really?!?

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  3. Haha he's such an idiot. LIVE!!!!! I wanna know how he didn't read her mind considering that's like his whole thing pretty much.

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  4. EXACTLY! J'onn had been established as one of the most skilled/powerful telepaths in the DCU and he gets schooled THAT easily?! It just doesn't make sense...

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  5. I really wonder why I keep reading that series, but I can't stop. I feel like when I do it'll get good like that last issue of Batman and Robin!

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  6. I'm still waiting on this issue of B&R... Blasted subscription service!!

    Personally, I know I keep reading because I've already gone THIS far... I keep thinking it HAS to end sooner or later, right? At least I sure as hell HOPE it ends sooner or later!!!

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  7. I don't think it ends until like April........ Yes... I am 100% serious. I think there's gonna be like 50 issues or something.

    Man, that B&R needs to hurry, it had to be good if I liked it after all those other crappy issues. Even it Hurt did come off looking like a dumbass.

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  8. 50 issues............ JT you just ruined my night! :D Jesus... Maybe it's time for me to drop this crap then...

    And I'm STILL waiting on it! Oh, and I like the idea of Hurt looking like a dumbass actually.

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  9. Lmao i looked it up, its only 24 issues. So my mistake :P

    Haha, then you're gonna love this issue. It was so good, I bet you end up hating it though haha.

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  10. Oh thank god... I couldn't have lasted 50 issues with out my brain literally exploding!

    HA! Watch, I'll read it and be like, "This issue sucked... What's up with JT???"

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  11. Haha, can you really last for like 12 more issues?

    Lol I think you do that anytime you go read a R&R after reviewing your comics. Hey, say what you want but I think that issue was worthy of at least an 8.5!

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  12. Well, I've made it 12 issues so far... If nothing else, I get to be really creative during my reviews because I hate everything about this series and I don't bother hiding that fact. I'll just keep getting more and more nasty/sarcastic as this damn series rolls along.

    HA! I DO NOT!! With the way my memory works, I'm lucky if I even remember which comics you reviewed, let alone what you scored 'em! :P

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  13. Haha. I don't know if I love reading a great comic and giving it a perfect score more, or reading a HORRIBLE comic and ripping it to shreds... then doing a harsh review! ;-)

    Lol so admitting to barely reading them eh? :P I KNEW it, ya just skim and look at scores, you jerk! Nah, I'm kidding, just wanted to call you a jerk.

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  14. Dude, sometimes ripping a horrible comic is WAY more fun than writing about a good one. I've got to admit, I enjoyed doing my review for X-Men vs Vampires #2 SO much because it was just mind-numbingly bad! When you read something epically bad you can just totally unload on it, which is always fun to do! :P

    Hey, check it out, you were right, I DID hate that issue of B&R! You sure do know me well! :D

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  15. Haha, I felt the same way when I ripped the last Blackest Night. That was such a horrible comic. Between that and Batman and Robin I never know WHAT to expect.

    Haha, I had a 50/50 chance in being correct but I'll take thos odds.

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  16. Plus of course there was your epic Landry review... I tend to enjoy myself more when tearing something I hated apart. I'd rather read a great comic, but I'd prefer to review a bad one, if that makes any sense.

    HA! I didn't even think of that... Good point. If you were to guess the scores for all of my reviews, you'd be right at least half the time... You're one tricky bastard, JT... :P

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  17. Haha, I knew that was gonna come up. I swear that'll always be synonymous with JTCS.

    Lol looking at last weeks R&R I almost DID guess all of your scores :P Oh, yeah, I'm the epitome of awesome.

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  18. Dude, the verbal beatdown you put on poor Landry's masterpiece was just so epic I'll NEVER be able to forget it! That review is those things that everybody should read at least once in their life just so they can say that they did. It was THAT epic!

    Well that's already been explained. We're two sides of the same coin or something like that. I'm more surprised when we DON'T agree on a score!

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  19. Lol well thanks. I think the only reason it was so great was because he unexpectedly commented which was the last thing anyone ever expects when they review something. Haha, that still makes me laugh.

    Good point, we're like weird comic book reviewing machines, made by the same evil madman.... Dr. Bong maybe?

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  20. JT, Landry actually responding was just the icing on the cake of awesomeness that was that review! If that review were a person, it would be me because of how utterly perfect it was. Or at least that's what I've heard other people say about me...

    Mayhaps you're right JT... Mayhaps you're right... That WOULD explain our inexplicable love for the good doctor...

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  21. Lmao... I love this new Shawn Michaels circa 1997 cockiness you're getting, it's hilarious. As for the reply, yeah. Like it already garnered a lot of attention from the Blog Squad but that reply from Landry is what made it so memorable.

    It's also explain your weird use of mayhaps. But yeah, maybe Dr. Bong made us, and I'm your younger, darker, sexier, smarter, funnier, cooler, fantastic-er clone! :D

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  22. That is so true. I mean the review was great, but Landry's reply made it epic. You know how quickly I'll forget things, but thanks to Landry's reply, that review is forever burned into my consciousness.

    "I'm your younger, darker, sexier, smarter, funnier, cooler, fantastic-er clone!" Okay, I'll give you younger and darker, but I'm gonna say that I was the sexier, smarter, funnier, cooler, fantastic-er, and dare I say more perfect clone! :D

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  23. And that's why it's such a great post, no one will EVER forget that haha. Even ten years from now if Landry becomes the next Brubaker, that post will always live on.

    The ONLY way you're perfect, as in you're as close to perfect in before reaching me. You're like Comic Reviewer 1.0 and I'm the more updated for the future version of 2.0 :P lol

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