The Best of the Rest!!! June 5th edition.

It's Saturday, which means it it's time for me to give my uninformed, overly sarcastic and at times offensive opinion on comic books and their creators, that's right, it's time for a new installment of The Best of the Rest! Ahh, that run-on sentence never gets old! And thus begin the excuses... So you see, I only have three pseudo-reviews to bust out tonight on account of my busy week(in other words, I've been lazy...). Now I'm sure you're probably thinking to yourself, “Well shucks, if he only has three reviews to do, these here reviews are gonna be DY-NO-MITE!” Sadly, that's not the case... No, be it thirty-seven reviews or three, I'm not going to bother putting together a really good Best of the Rest, I just can't. Nope, this post will be as bad(or maybe even worse!)then all of the other Best of the Rest posts, or my name isn't BENDIS! Um, I mean X...

Deadpool #22: So Deadpool is on a bus to Georgia as a part of his seemingly never ending quest to become a better super-hero... I'm not really sure how he expects to learn the finer points of super-heroics in Georgia, but whatever. DP's bus winds up getting hijacked by a bunch of slack-jawed redneck types, and DP decides to put a world-class whooping on them(that's how you say, “He's going to beat them up” in redneck). So DP is showing up the hillbillies when a really large redneck wearing a big ol' battery pack moseys on over to DP and blasts him full of electricity(That's redneck for, “They shocked DP up but good!”). DP wakes up and after finding a police radio realizes that the robbers had to be local police officers. So DP heads down to the station house and finds one of the yokels who robbed his bus settin' behind his desk(that's redneck for, “sitting behind his desk” yeah, it's not much of a difference, but still)DP locks up the crooked cop and discovers a rather attractive female cop also at the station. The female cop tells DP where he could find the rest of the crooked cop posse(that's redneck for, “crooked police officer gang” that's right, I'm going to BEAT this gag into the ground!), so DP heads out to shut those lousy cops down hard, but not before he locks up the female cop after he figures out that she was the brains of the operation... This is actually revealed at the end of this comic, but since it's my review(or pseudo-review)I don't have to follow a linear path! Hell, one day I might just review a comic backwards! Anyway, back to the story... DP tracks down the crooked cops, and shuts them down. The end... What? That's more or less what happened here. DP beat up the crooked cops, left them for the ATF(because the crooked cops were also making moonshine)and leaves town with a spring in his step and a song in his heart. The real question is, what's up with Daniel Way and the state of Georgia?! Ah reckon he ain'ts like's 'em folks much(that's redneck for, “I don't think he likes those nimrods much”)... Score: 6 1/2 out of 10.Is he even speaking English!?! Sheesh...

Thor #610: And so we pick up after the Siege storyline... Who the HELL opens up a review(or pseudo-review)by saying, “And so”? What horrible sentence structure... Anywho, Balder(who is the current king of Asgard FYI)is roaming around the ruins of Asgard thinking about what a crappy job he's been doing as king... Well, considering you allowed your people to be pretty much spanked by Norman “Freaking” Osborn, I'd have to agree. Thor arrives to tell Balder that he's done an admirable job as king(um, really?), and that Balder should remain the king of Asgard, but with Thor as his advisor. So yay, Thor is un-exiled from Asgard(“un-exiled”?)and Balder the Jellyfish is still the king. All is right and good in Asgard... Or is it?!? I'll answer that one myself, no, everything most definitely ISN'T good in Asgard! Thor's deranged clone, Ragnarok, climbs out of some rubble and decides to beat down some Asgardians in an effort to get Thor's attention... Man, for gods, the Asgardians are being trounced by just about everybody lately! Thor confronts his wacky clone, and after a few shouts of “verily”, “thou” and “Pretender” the two battle, with Thor pretty much demolishing Ragnarok in quick fashion... Huh, that was... pretty anti-climatic actually... Oh, and that was also the end of this comic... Score: 7 out of 10.HEY!!! What's Green Arrow doing in Asgard!?!

Justice League: Generation Lost #2: This issue kicks off with the former JLI members(or the c-list members of the JLA, if you prefer)trying to convince Superman that Maxwell Lord had erased knowledge of his existence from every person on Earth(and maybe Mars too, who knows). Supes(being an a-lister)doesn't have time to humor a bunch of losers, and pretty much says so(but in his non-offensive, Superman sort of way)before leaving. The c-listers decide to split up and see if they can convince anybody that they're telling the truth... You know, if the world's biggest boy scout won't believe you, I don't think anybody else will... Booster Gold heads to the Batcave, where Batman won't believe him, while Fire learns that she was fired by Checkmate by Wonder Woman, who insists that she had never killed anybody by the name of Max Lord. But she did! I read it!! Oh wait, Max Lord must have erased her memory! Of course... Ice tries to convince Guy Gardner that Max Lord is trouble, but Guy refuses to listen, since Max had put some false memories in his head making Guy think Ice was crazy... Wait, so Max Lord was able to alter the mind of a Green Lantern?!? Huh... Captain Atom heads to his military base and spots Max Lord, and immediately attacks him. Atom beats up Max, and during the beating, Atom realizes that he wasn't beating up Max, but that he was pummeling his commanding officer! Whoops!! Atom runs away from the military base, and meets up with the other JLI members, and the c-listers share their sob stories. They all figure out that Max was discrediting them(ya think?!?)and Fire and Ice leave, deciding that they didn't want to deal with the situation anymore. Atom and Booster are told by Skeets(you know, that little sassy robot thing that's always haunting around Booster)that they were being monitored by something in El Paso, Texas. So the two heroes head to the great state of Texas to find... Oh come on... the fake Blue Beetle being beaten up by a bunch of OMACs. Way to ruin a perfectly good comic there guys! Score: 9 out of 10.Isn't it funny how I didn't even mention Magog in this review, but then I posted a page with him? And THAT ladies and gentlemen is why I call them, pseudo-reviews!