Monday, August 2, 2010

Picto-Review: REBELS #18.

Hey wait, isn't it Sunday night? Doesn't that mean it's supposed to be time for the “Random Scan of the Week!”(copyright pending)? Don't worry, you haven't stumbled into some sort of Bizarro version of this blog where all of the posts are good and your humble blog editor isn't a blithering idiot. Nope, this is STILL the same blog you know and love(like? tolerate? loath?), the reviews are STILL crappy, and I'm STILL a blithering idiot, I'm just trying out something a bit different tonight. I'm going to review the latest issue of REBELS with pictures instead of words, which would explain the incredibly clever(and original!)title of this post. In a way this is all JT's fault... Yes, the very same JT of of the strangely captivating (there I plugged your blog for you this time, JT!)was in a way the inspiration for this post... Sort of... Well, not really, but kind of. Anyway, JT made the mistake of asking me about Vril Dox and the Brainiac family on one of the posts on this blog, which led to a REALLY long-winded explanation(sort of like this intro...). After finishing up that comment, I started thinking about just how good REBELS #18 was, and how it really deserved a review, even if nobody would read it... But alas, I knew I didn't really have the time to do a long, boring post. It was then a brilliant(hey, I'm narrating this thing, so yes, brilliant!)idea struck me... Why not scan a few pages(no more then 7)from this comic and simply add a few captions? That wouldn't take up TOO much time(unlike this blasted intro!!!), plus I'd be able to say(to myself I guess...)that I did indeed give this comic the review it so deserved! And thus the Picto-Review was born. If this post is well-enough received then I'll try to post a few more Picto-Reviews. If not then I'll act like it never happened. I've become quite good at pretending things didn't happen... Anyway, I think that's MORE then enough of an introduction(and really, did this post even NEED an intro?), let's get on to the pretty, pretty pictures!

This issue gets underway with Lyrl Dox(son of REBELS/LEGION founder Vril Dox and grandson of Brainiac)telling his newest weapon, Pulsar Stargrave(that big star thing with the blue eye)the history of the Dox family tree.

Meanwhile, Vril brings Brainiac home to the planet Colu, where the elder Brainiac is looking forward to a lifetime spent as a drooling vegetable in penance for his MANY crimes.

After turning Brainiac over to his fellow Coluians, Vril decides to pay his “father” a final visit in order to do some good old-fashioned taunting before taking off.

Unfortunately for Vril, Brainiac isn't nearly so much a drooling vegetable as much as he is a very large, very angry super-villain. Before Vril can decide what to do about the fully coherent Brainiac, the entire planet is suddenly attacked by...

Pulsar Stargrave and Lyrl!

We end this issue with Brainiac breaking free of his bonds and deciding that 3 Brainiacs were two too many.

What I Thought: If you were able to make it through the introduction(and if you did, good for you!), I'm sure you could tell that I really enjoyed this comic. As a matter of fact, I'd call it the PERFECT jumping on point for new readers. The Brainiac history is plainly laid out, and all three generations of the Brainiac family wind up at each other's throats. This comic really had it all, some insanity from Lyrl, some evil from Brainiac, and some general jackassery from Vril. What more could you ask for? Oh yeah, there was also a back story in which Starfire decides to sleep with Capt. Comet, but only to take her mind off of how much she missed Dick Grayson, which seems to hit the love-struck Comet pretty hard, as you can see here:

And that's pretty much that. As always, comments are appreciated, since that's pretty much the only way I can tell if anybody liked this post. X out.

Score: 10 out of 10. Yup, that's right, a rare perfect score. Told you I liked this comic!


  1. Dude, I REALLY like this idea, and not just because my blog was plugged :P But honestly, it's very interesting and a fun way to summarize it, great work.

  2. I liked this format a lot, and I hope to see it again!

    I recently stated that "Starfire was created solely for the purpose of promoting more T&A in comics" and I see that trend continuing here. Is there any way to salvage her as actual character?

  3. Great! Thanks for the feedback gents. I'll try to do another one for Superman #601 soon(maybe tomorrow), since I can already picture the post in my head... Hint, it'll have Supes walking... A LOT!

    I figured I'd save you the trouble of having to plug your blog JT! :D

    Honestly, I kind of doubt it Kello... I mean her entire character seems to be the fact that she IS an intergalactic hussy! She's always been that way so far as I know... I remember her marrying a guy from Tamaran, consummating the marriage and then telling Dick that they could still get frisky, married of not! I've always seen her as a bland/empty character whose sole purpose was to titillate some readers. Needless to say, I'm not a big Starfire fan! :P

  4. Shall we just rename her Starwhore and leave it at that? ;)

  5. Heh heh, Starwhore... You know I'm probably gonna wind up using that one of these days!

  6. I might as well post it here. I'm definitely not gonna be able to do that review of Supes #601 tonight. I have 85 Spanish vocab words to memorize by Thursday(as well as the subjunctive and the differences between por and para), so that's going to have to take precedence. I MIGHT have that review up come tomorrow, since I don't think it should be all that long/difficult to put together.

  7. I was gonna let it slide but it's Supes 701 :P He and Bats are in the 700's, Wondy's on the 600's. And you call yourself the KING of comics :P

    But take your time dude, we all know Spanish and school are MUCH more important than reviews, finish em when ya can buddy.

  8. HA! Blast you and your eagle eyes JT! I'm going to play the Spanish card and claim that I was SO worn out from homework/studying that I was nearly incoherent! :P

  9. Really cool way of reviewing this comic, X-Man! I must admit to not knowing much about the series, but you've certainly gotten my interest with all these pictures. I'd love to see more this in the future...but like JT said, solamente si tienes el tiempo, sí?

  10. Thanks for the kind words Marc. I think for a series like this, one that isn't as widely known, these types of reviews are the way to go. That way a non-reader might see a panel or piece of art and decide to give the series a shot. And on the plus side for me, they're way easier to do then a full review!

    You remember when you warned me about the subjunctive? Now I can understand why!! Ye-ouch!