Saturday, May 7, 2011

Deadpool Annual #1 & Uncanny X-Force #9

Hey X-Maniacs, your friend and servant here with some haphazardly put together reviews! I knew that I had to at least post something today, so you guys get two of my crappier reviews. Since I'm still slogging my way through one of my three final papers to close out this semester, I haven't had the time to put the eXtra(HA!) love and attention into these reviews... And I didn't bother to proof read them either! So if they suck, I know. By this time next week I'll have plenty of time to devote to mediocre comic book reviews. But for now? Ahoy sucky reviews!

Deadpool Annual #1:

Summary: Picking up from this year's Amazing Spider-Man annual, Deadpool and his alternate dimensional friend, Death Wish, hang out and have a blast doing all sorts of crazy Deadpool-esque things. Naturally Deadpool figures Death Wish is the Wade Wilson of this dimension, but is shocked to learn that Death Wish WASN'T Wade Wilson, but was working for that world's Wade Wilson, who was basically his dimension's Dr. Doom, a bad piece of work called Death Mask. Death Mask kills Death Wish right in front of Pool since Death Wish had failed a mission he had been ordered to do, which leads to Deadpool swearing vengeance on his counterpart. Pool hunts down and kills several of Death Mask's henchmen(including Hydra Bob!) before confronting Death Mask in Wilson Tower, Death Mask's base of operations. Pool tosses a bomb at Death Mask, who figures he'd survive while Pool would die, not realizing that Pool was his alternate dimensional counterpart, and also had a healing factor. Pool wakes up first(since he was further away from the explosion) and changes clothes with Death Mask. Pool(now masquerading as Death Mask) then has Death Mask(now dressed as Deadpool) put on a boat and blown up. With Death Mask out of the way, Pool rechristens Wilson Tower Wilson Tower(HA!), before dismantling Death Mask's criminal empire and donating all of Death Mask's ill-begotten riches to a charity in Death Wish's name. By this point Spidey catches up to Pool and after a brief misunderstanding and fight, the two make up and share a VERY long and uncomfortable(for Spidey) hug. From there, Death Mask heads to Hell and begs Mephisto for assistance against his foe. Mephisto's solution? A crazed, horn-headed Hulk!

Thoughts: I really enjoyed this one... Like a lot. Granted, my review for it was crap, but don't let that fool you, this was a great comic. I'm actually enjoying this entire storyline. It concludes in the Invincible Hulks Annual next month, and you can be SURE I'll be picking up a copy!

Score: 9 out of 10.Kiss him... Kiss him......


Uncanny X-Force #9:

Summary: Magneto sends Dr. Nemesis out to dig up some information on some old Nazi who used to torment Mags back when he was in the concentration camps. Upon receiving info that the old Nazi was still alive, as well as his whereabouts, Mags takes a drink and heads to X-Force's supposedly secret lair... I don't like the way this one's going... Needless to say, X-Force is surprised that Mags knew where they were/what they were up to, and Wolvie asks Mags point blank how he knew where they were, to which Mags simply responds, “Remember to whom you are speaking.” Wait, Mags isn't the telepath! Xavier is!! *sigh* Anyway, for some reason, Mags doesn't want to kill the old Nazi himself, so he asks Wolvie to do it for him. Naturally, Wolvie says yes, because this entire issue is taking place in Bizarro World. Wolvie packs a samurai sword(because he's apparently forgotten he has claws), and flies to Brazil, which is where all old Nazis end up. The old Nazi tells Wolvie that he lived a good life, had a family and kids, but always knew one of his victims would exact retribution on him eventually. Wolvie draws his sword, and the old Nazi warns Wolvie that one day Wolvie's victims would exact their revenge, at which point Wolvie kills the Nazi and leaves, (MERCIFULLY!)ending this one.

Thoughts: My god, where do I even begin with this one?!? I guess I'll start with Magneto, a man who has killed thousands. Magneto, who in this issue didn't want to kill somebody who he had a real grievance against. Not one of his imagined, “All humans hate me!” grievances, but a real one! I mean if EVER Mags should have went and murdered somebody, THIS was that moment! Okay, so if you're Magneto, you've found some Nazi who tormented you in your youth, but for some reason you don't want to kill him personally, what do you do? Why you turn to one of your oldest enemies of course! Moving past Magneto and his bizarre behavior, we find Wolverine, who actually TOPS Mags in the weird behavior department in this one! Why the HELL would Wolvie help Magneto EVER! This is the same man who nearly killed the X-Men a number of times, has killed countless innocents, killed Jean Grey, I mean, was replaced by a FAKE Magneto, who actually killed Jean, thus leaving Mags hands clean............... And oh yeah, TORE OUT WOLVERINE'S ADAMANTIUM!!! I mean... How could... Who would... Why?! Just why?!? I'm going to end this post as positively as I can given the circumstances. I've enjoyed most of Rick Remender's Uncanny X-Force. But this issue? Horrible.

Score: 3 out of 10."Remember that whole ripping the Adamantium out of me and nearly killing me? Water under the bridge old friend!"

3 comments:

  1. Kiss Him!!!! That's quickly becoming one of your catchphrases. And you made it seem like you were gonna rate this low saying "I didnt love it as much as you" and you gave it ONE damn grade lower! :P Anyway, I marked out for the Deadpool version of villains and Bob just being Bob...

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  2. I couldn't call it perfect, but I could call it DAMN good!

    Bob simply being Bob(and getting killed!) was one of the many highlights of this one... That and Pool crossing out the Wilson in Wilson Tower and then spray painting Wilson back again!

    And yes, anytime I can drop the "Kiss him..." line, I WILL take it!!

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  3. Haha, the Wilson Tower thing was icing on the cake, because when he crossed it out I was thinking... What the hell else can he put there?! I love when Deadpool has genius plans yet still jokes and comes off like an idiot...

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