Another day, another Quick Hits post. The four comics I'll be taking a look at today are all Fear Itself tie-ins, and to be completely honest, they ranged from not that good to out-and-out terrible... I mean reading these books took some real willpower from yours truly! Well, let's get this cavalcade of comic crap out of the way... As always with these Quick Hits posts, I'm only spending 5 sentences or less on the actual review before heading to my “Thoughts” the score and the scan. If you want to know more about one of these comics, feel free to inquire about them in the comments section, although after reading these comics I can't imagine ANYBODY would want to talk about them...
Fear Itself: Deadpool #2(of 3):
What Happened: Deadpool's plan of having the Walrus terrorize a small town(in disguise), moves along smoothly, so Pool readies the second phase of his plan, defeating the Walrus and reaping the rewards from the town. Pool basically has his way with the Walrus until nightfall, when we find out that the hammer Pool gave to the Walrus to attack the town actually had some sort of bizarre werewolf/healing factor negating powers, which helps the Walrus take Pool down and out.
Thoughts: You know what the sad thing is? Out of the four comics I read for this post, THIS was the best one of the bunch! Things only go downhill from here! Honestly, the best thing about this issue was the cover, which was hilarious. I mean this issue had it's moments, I did enjoy Pool in a VERY lame disguise directing the idiotic Walrus's attack on the town, but the story has practically nothing to do with Fear Itself, except that Pool got the idea to give Walrus that hammer because of the Serpent and his Worthy. If you're following the whole FI event, this is a very easily skipped mini-series.
Score: 5 1/2 out of 10.Deadpool's Serpent disguise = Awesome!
Iron Man 2.0 #7(Fear Itself tie-in):
What Happened: The Immortal Weapons try to close the gate to Hell which opened in Beijing thanks to the Serpent's hammer tearing reality asunder. Before they can shut the portal, Iron Fist winds up getting possessed and attacking the rest of the Weapons. Luckily, War Machine is also there, and he takes on the possessed Iron Fist. The battle rages for WAY longer than it should(I mean War Machine is a frigging tank!), but War Machine manages to defeat Iron Fist with some mystical help from Dr. Strange from afar, who was spying on events. The Weapons then close the portal, nobody seems to know what the problem with Iron Fist was, and War Machine's part in Fear Itself thankfully comes to an end.
Thoughts: I am so glad this issue ended this series involvement in Fear Itself. I barely care about Iron Fist and hate the Immortal Weapons. I mean I like War Machine a lot, but he was almost a second thought these past few issues... Instead we get those damned Immortal Weapons and their completely asinine names(The Handsome Monkey King, The Bride of Nine Spiders, The Prince of Orphans... Are you kidding me?!), nothing really happening involving Fear Itself, and War Machine, who happens to be wearing a state of the art suit of armor, having difficulty defeating Iron Fist, a guy who kicks things... Yeah, this was pretty brutal.
Score: 4 out of 10.Apparently, you should always bet on the guy who kicks things instead of the guy in the multi-million dollar suit of armor.
Uncanny X-Men #541(Fear Itself tie-in):
What Happened: Lord Summers sends out a few waves of X-Men to probe the Serpent possessed Juggernaut for weaknesses, which only leads to his most powerful X-Men making a tiny crack in Juggy's helmet. So naturally, Lord Summers sends out Our Lord and Savior Hope, who manages to pull the Juggernaut's helmet off... Typing that line leaves me SO pissed I can barely finish typing this up... Anyway, Emma Frost tries to enter Juggy's mind to shut him down, but can't, and this issue ends with the X-Men unsure what to do next.
Thoughts: You know, this issue started off well enough. Lord Summers actually enacted a plan that made great sense all things considered, since he was dealing with an old foe with vastly improved abilities... And then Our Lord and Savior Hope showed up... Seriously, Kieron Gillen HAS to get away from the X-books, because his obsession with Our Lord and Savior Hope is bordering on the unintentionally hilarious! I mean every goddamn issue of this goddamn comic book lately has revolved around goddamn Hope!! And do you know what that's doing to me? It's making me hate her with a passion I usually reserve for Barry Allen... THAT'S how much I'm starting to hate Hope! I'm comparing her to the character who singlehandedly destroyed most of my interest in DC comics! Hope has got to go, and Gillen has got to go with her, because once again, he ruined what could have been a very good comic book.
Score: 5 out of 10.Next up for Our Savior Hope, defeating every super-villain in the Marvel Universe simultaneously while explaining the finer points of the Negative Zone to Mr. Fantastic...
Fear Itself: Fearsome Four #2(of 4):
What Happened: The Man-Thing defeats Frankenstein, She-Hulk, Howard the Duck and Nighthawk(collectively known as The Worst Team Ever) before moving deeper into NYC. When the ragtag group regain their senses, Frankenstein gives his origin story(REALLY!?! Was that necessary?!) before the team continues after Man-Thing. It turns out the Psycho Man is also after Man-Thing, since he sees Man-Thing as a weapon he could use to further enhance his emotion control abilities. With the Psycho Man on one side, and a crazed Man-Thing on the other, who should show up but the infamous New Fantastic Four(Wolverine, Spider-Man, the gray Hulk and Ghost Rider) from the past. Sure, why not.
Thoughts: What can I say? The story was barely coherent, the artwork was done by two or three different artists, giving this comic no sense of cohesiveness, and Howard the Duck was here. What did my poor, darling She-Hulk do to deserve inclusion in THIS awful mini-series? And to make matters worse, there wasn't a single appearance by the Serpent or his Worthy, thus breaking my first rule with calling something a Fear Itself tie-in. Sure, Man-Thing going crazy is a direct result of the Fear Itself events, but that's not the same as an appearance by one of the main Fear Itself threats. This is another FI “tie-in” that should definitely be avoided...
Score: 3 out of 10.Ever wanted to see a duck talk to Frankenstein? Then you're in luck!!