Hey X-Maniacs, happy Valentine's Day! That is if you actually care about that sort of thing... As you can probably tell from that prior statement, I'm flying solo this Valentine's Day, so screw you card and candy companies and your pathetic corporate “holiday”! Of course my attitude towards Valentine's Day could very easily change depending on my romantic status come next year, but for this year? Screw Valentine's Day! :D With that rather pathetic diatribe out of the way, let's get to the review, a very special Valentine's Day issue of Batgirl... Sheesh, et tu, Batgirl...
Review: We get things started with Batgirl coming across the scene of a dead pimp with his face torn up and his heart torn out of his chest on Valentine's night. Batgirl follows the trail of blood to Klarion... Bum... Bum... Bum... The Witch Boy, who seems to be preforming some sort of magical ritual on the heart. Klarion tries to explain that things weren't the way they seemed, but Batgirl isn't buying, and moves in to apprehend Klarion. This proves to be a slight mistake in judgment by Batgirl, as Klarion shrinks Batgirl down and puts her into a snow globe. Klarion explains that he was trying to locate his cat, Teekl, who Klarion had prevented from “coupling” with another cat, leading to Teekl growing in size to a 6 foot tall sex-crazed were-cat. God do I love this series... Batgirl offers to help Klarion find his cat, so Klarion returns Batgirl to her normal size and the two follow some screams to the location of Teekl, who is attacking a happy couple. Batgirl implores Klarion to use his magic on Teekl to halt the angry were-cat's rampage, but Klarion is unable to use his magick on his familiar. With Klarion unable(and/or unwilling) to stop Teekl, Batgirl manages to put Teekl down with some electric batarangs. With Teekl incapacitated, Klarion traps his cat in a snow globe and mopes. Batgirl wonders why Klarion doesn't just reverse the spell and turn Teekl back into a normal cat, but Klarion explains that until Teekl completes his coupling ritual, he had to remain a were-cat. This is an obvious problem since there aren't a lot of mating choices for 6 foot tall were-cats... Klarion reveals to Batgirl that he doesn't want Teekl to find a mate, since he was afraid that would lead to him losing his best feline friend. Batgirl convinces Klarion that all Teekl needed was to get the whole mating thing out of his system, and that once he did Teekl would go back to being Klarion's best friend again. To find Teekl a mate, Klarion teleports with Batgirl back to his home dimension, Limbo Town. The two wander around for a bit until they spot a girl with a cat. Batgirl picks a fight with the girl, while Klarion rounds up the girl's cat and the two teleport back to Earth. Klarion puts the girl's cat in the snow globe and the two cats begin... well, coupling. While the cats are getting' busy, Batgirl changes to her civilian identity and takes Klarion to the Gotham University campus with her. Steph and Klarion happen across some of Steph's more unlikable classmates, and they begin to make fun of Steph and her “boyfriend” Klarion, calling Klarion weird. Klarion takes great offense at that and prepares to magic the girls into something not very good, at which time Steph lays a big old kiss on Klarion to distract him. The girls leave Steph and Klarion alone, at which time the two buy some Valentine's candies and wait for the coupling to be completed.
Thoughts: I literally laughed pretty damn hard four different times over the course of reading this comic book. Sure, the story was kind of weird, but anytime I laugh THAT many times over the course of a comic usually indicates the comic was VERY good. Bryan Q. Miller really is a hell of a writer, as this comic once again showed. It was just a good, dumb, fun, one and done comic. One of those comic books where you could turn off your brain, sit back and unwind with. I can guarantee this will be the best Valentine's tale about a Witch Boy and a were-cat you will EVER read!
Score: 9 out of 10.Yes, I cracked up at the "wandering pack of harlots" line.